- Succeed by Building Others Up
- We are One but we are Many – Race & Racism
- How to Bring Out the Best in People
- Are You Addicted to Hot Juicy Gossip?
- Meet Invisible People
- People Series Summary – People & Success
- A Winning Contacts Building Strategy
- Stuff Positive People Like
- A Magic Word Called Empathy
- The Curse of Conformity
- Show Me Your Friends
People have a beautiful side and a not so beautiful side to them. That is why you can find someone so attractive one day and want to run away from them the next day. You can bring out the best in your partner, friend, business associate or even strangers by following the following tips.
1) Be genuinely interested in people: If someone senses that you are genuinely interested in them without any ulterior motives, they are more likely to show you their best side.
2) Expect the best from people: Whatever you expect from people becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. If you sincerely expect someone to treat you right, that is what you will get.
3) Understand people have different needs: Avoid stereotypes. People are unique and you should seek to understand them with all their uniqueness. Do not treat everyone as though they came from the same production line.
4) Do not criticize people: People do not like to be criticized. Parents should in particular avoid criticizing children every time they do not live up to their adult expectations. When you criticize people, they feel inadequate and become less free to be their true self around you. If someone makes a mistake, do not make them feel too bad about it. Have a soft landing, think of alternatives of achieving your objectives without making them look silly or evil.
5) Be a good listener: You have two ears and one mouth. It is not an accident. Use them in that ratio. Improve your listening skills. Learn to listen to people’s spoken words and body language.
7) Be generous: I find that every time I am generous to someone, their personality seems to change. Maybe I imagine it, but I swear people seem more beautiful just after generosity.
8 ) Be positive: Quit whining and crying over everything. Be full of positive energy and give hope instead of being a prophet of gloom.
9) Gain and maintain trust: Trust is built over time. People are at their best with people they can trust. They are more relaxed and confident with people they trust. Seek to gain the trust of people and guard it when you get it. Do not abuse a trust relationship.
10) Make people laugh: It takes more muscles to smile than to frown. Be a joyful soul and you will make people be at ease. If you have a good sense of humor, use it. Do not laugh at people, instead laugh with them.
11) Keep the focus on them: People are generally selfish. You and I included. They want to hear and talk about me, me and more me. I did this, I will do this, I this or I that are very common in conversations. Keep the focus on a person and they will let their beautiful side reign.
12) Accept people for who they are: Do not always try to change people to be the perfect version of them that you have in your mind. People love being accepted for who they are.
13) Be reliable: Reliability is what really sets aside a friend from a stranger. You can rely on a friend to be there for you in good and bad times. Do not treat people well only when it suits you. Be a reliable friend and they will be a reliable friend to you (in most cases).
14) Avoid mixed signals: Set boundaries and know thyself. If you keep changing the signals you give people they will give a less than stellar version of themselves. Be consistent in the kind of signals you give.
You can get to see the lovely side of people if you treat them well, listen to them, understand them and be generous. Avoid giving mixed signals to people, be reliable and never abuse trust. People love being accepted for who they are instead of being criticized and turned into something else just to suit you.
Enjoy your 2009 Valentines. Hope you can use these tips to bring out the best in your Valentine, and other people in your life.