Love and the Appreciation Factor

According to the late Mother Teresa “There is more hunger for love and appreciation in this world than for bread”. The greatest human need is the need to be appreciated. Showing love and appreciation to others implies abundance on your part. When you have an abundant mindset, you attract love and success to your life.

What is Love?

There are a million and three ways of defining love. Love is a strong positive emotion of regard and affection. It is a deep feeling of sexual desire and attraction. According to the bible, Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful.

What is Appreciation?

Appreciation is an expression of gratitude. It is the understanding of the nature or meaning or quality or magnitude of something. Appreciation is the opposite of taking things for granted. You can appreciate the good that others do. You can appreciate what your loved one, employee, employer, friend or parent does.

How to Show Love

• Empathy – You can show love to someone by understanding them and seeing things from their perspective. Putting yourself in someone’s shoes is a brilliant way of showing your love.
• Speak Love – Tell your partner that you love them. Say the magic words. Let them hear you say it.
• Time - Time is a finite resource. Spending time with someone is a great way of showing love. Do not do disappearing acts on those you love. Spending quality time with the one you love helps them feel special.
• Communication – Talk openly, clearly and firmly with those you love. Do not give them conflicting messages. Set clear boundaries of what can or cannot be done and communicate that as clearly as possible. Use communication to manage expectations to avoid disappointments.
• Actions – Actions speak louder than words. Show love by doing what you are expected to do, and beyond. Walk the talk.
• Honesty – Be brutally honest with those you love. There is nothing that erodes love as fast as broken trust.
• Affection – Depending on your culture or relationship, you can demonstrate your love through affection, either privately or publicly (PDA).
• Gifts - Giving gifts is a good way of showing love. Give out of love and do not expect something in return. Do not give gifts only when you are obligated to give such as birthday or holidays.
• Hour of Need – Be there at the hour of need when your friend or loved ones needs you. There is nothing worse than the feeling of being forsaken at the hour of need. Be careful not to be perceived as a fair weather friend.
• Complements - Give genuine complements to your loved one. It is a good way of building that warm feeling and confidence. Learn the difference between flattery and genuine complements.
• Compromise – Be flexible and willing to meet half way. Do not insist on only having your way. Do not let them walk all over you either.
• Forgiveness – Do not hold grudges for longer than you have to. Learn to let go and forgive people for wrong doing. Give your loved one wiggle space if they find themselves on the wrong. Do not make them feel cornered. Give them a soft landing and an opportunity to rectify their  mistakes.

How to Show Appreciation

• Be creative – Do not do what is expected all the time. Take time to think of ways of showing appreciation, depending on what the person did. Appreciation does not have to be complex or expensive.
• Tell them – The best way of appreciating someone is to tell them that you do. Be specific on what you are thanking them for.
• Spend Time – Spend time with people you appreciate.
• Recognition – Recognize people for their good deeds publicly or within your circle of friends. Genuine recognition can be a fuel for more good deeds.
• Focus on the good side – Focus on the positive aspect of their actions. Talk about it with them, highlight what you like, and they may continue doing more of that.
• Thank you notes – Send follow up thank you notes to people who go out of their way to make you happy or perform exceptional service.

Summary

Love one another, and appreciate those who do  good things. Appreciation is one of the deepest of human desires. Showing love and appreciation attracts good things to your life. Be more proactive in showing love and appreciation.

I would love to hear of ways that you have used to show love or appreciation. Please post your comments (be specific on what kind of actions you took or recommend).

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