3 Seconds First Impression

You don’t need a second chance to make a first impression. In fact you only have 3 seconds to make a first impression. Changing that first impression is harder than learning a new language. If you absolutely must make a lasting impression, you need to pack the best of you in those 3 seconds. Have I used up my 3 seconds yet?

Whether in business or social situations, people take an average of 3 seconds to evaluate and rank others. If someone perceives you to be of lower status than them, they will treat you with indifference, disdain or outright hostility. If you are perceived to be of higher status, you will be accorded respect, adoration, mild worship and regarded as a valuable contact.

In relationships, people struggle and stress about making a good first impression; and for good reason. The first few seconds of a couple meeting can be the deal maker or deal breaker. It can mean the difference between going north and going south. There are tricks from the seduction community that seem to work like a charm, but long term relationships are by and large determined by those first seconds.

An interview panel is likely to judge a book by its cover as soon as the interviewee walks in. Many people decide at a glance if they are going to do business with you or not. What you say after they see you might not really make them change their mind. It is sad but true. We can sit back and moan this fact or we can rise up and do something about it. Let us look at a few ways of making those 3 seconds count.

1 – Smile

Richard Branson was once called the “grinning pullover”. He is a happy fellow who smiles a lot more than his fellow billionaire Donald Trump.

Smiling quickly puts people at ease. It is an easy way of improving the first impression. Smiling makes one look more attractive. Attractive people have an easier time attracting attention. Smile and make people attentive.

2 – Be Yourself

Have you seen the movie “Meet the Parents”? If you have you probably know how awkward it looks when someone is trying to put on an act when faced by unfamiliar situations.

If you can help it, be yourself. Let people see the real you. If you find yourself trying to change yourself to fit in, ask yourself the following questions.

• Is it worth it for me to put on a front?
• Am I hanging out with the wrong people?
• Is there a better way of reaching my goals without being a fake?
• What do I need to change for me to fit in naturally?
• Who am I? What do I represent?

3 – Always on Time

If you mean business do not be late for meetings. It leaves a sour taste in the mouths of those you keep waiting. Being on time will add a few points and being late will subtract the little goodwill you might have had.

Do your best to respect other people’s time. Plan in advance. Schedule meetings and set reminders. Develop a reputation of being a good time manager. If you are currently not good with time, start small. Be early for your next meeting, then the next, and then the next one. With time, that will become a habit and come to you effortlessly.

4 – Presentation

How you present yourself to others will dramatically influence how they view you. Personal grooming and lifestyle have a big impact on first impressions.

A few years ago, I hailed a taxi on St George’s Terrace in Perth, Western Australia. I was wearing an Italian business suit that would have made tailors in Italy proud of me.

The taxi driver stopped and took me around town as I handled my business. I felt like Tom Cruise in the movie “Collateral”. The only difference was that my weapon of choice was sharp dressing and good presentation.

The taxi driver looked at me for 3 seconds and instantly trusted me. He drove me around and a few times I left his taxi to go to my marathon appointments around town. He patiently waited in the car with nothing more than my promise to be back. I got back and gave him a healthy tip.

The next day was a Friday. I went to Northbridge, Western Australia with a couple of my Kenyan friends. After a few hours of clubbing we got tired and tried to catch a taxi home. All the taxis zoomed past us, completely ignoring us. It sure felt different from the previous day’s treatment.

Finally one taxi drive stopped, looked at us for 3 seconds and demanded money upfront which is not the norm in Western Australia. You see my friend; here we were three black guys dressed in jeans and T-Shirts in Northbridge on a Friday night. We looked “suspicious”. Are you “suspicious” looking? Do you hang out in “suspicious” places?

5 – Preparation

People will brand you with what you present to them the first time you meet. You may have an arsenal of personality traits. What trait do you choose to bring to the table today? Preparation can help you adapt your personality traits for the situation. This does not mean being fake. It means choosing what side of you to emphasize.

If you are going for meetings you need to prepare and do your part. Nothing makes someone look unprofessional like lack of preparation. You have been warned.

6 – Confidence

The way you walk, the way you talk and present yourself is impacted by your level of confidence. Seek to develop your self confidence. It will make a big difference in how you interact with others and how they perceive you.

 Even the way you shake people’s hands or address them can reveal how confident you are. Confidence is a first impression masterstroke.

Summary

First impressions are very hard to erase. If making a lousy first impression is going to cost you relationships and opportunities, then you need to change how you approach this issue.

The first impression is the first point of interaction with your personal brand and you should do your utmost best to make it the best.

I would love to hear your experiences and thoughts about first impressions. Your comments are most welcome.

Cheers.

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