Someone once said, “Given a long enough timeline, we shall all be dead”. Life is so temporary. We are on earth for a season, yet for a reason. Why are you here? Have you found your mission yet? Have you found your calling yet? What would your legacy be if you took your last breath tonight?

I always fantasized about dying young when I was younger. I listened to Tupac and Biggie Smalls as they sang about their impending deaths. But death no longer excites me. I don’t get the same kick nowadays when I write my own obituary. Unfortunately, my death is just around the corner.

Knowing that I am only mortal helps me focus on the important things in life. I know I can be re-called to my maker anytime now so I have to make every moment count. Am I freaking you out?

Imagine the shock that Nelson Mandela must have had in 2001 when CNN pre-maturely (wrongly) published his pre-written obituary. CNN pulled down the webpage in 20 minutes but the damage had already been done.

Nelson Mandela was neither the first nor the last person to be pre-maturely declared dead. When Mark Twain was wrongly reported to be dead, this is what he famously said: “The report of my death has been grossly exaggerated”.

I know this a gloomy way to start the year, but stay with me.

When setting your 2010 resolutions (if you have not already done so), please keep in mind that you are only here for a season. Align your resolutions with your true mission in life.

If you found out that you were terminally ill, would you spend more time at the pub? Would you spend more time with your family? Would you travel the world? Would you try to make more money? What would you really do?

Find out what really matters and only do that. Your time is limited.

It is an excellent way to put your life in perspective and I recommend that you try it. Many people would rather not think about it. There is comfort in not thinking about death. It is a taboo subject.  But given a long enough time line we shall all cease to exist. Why not use this taboo subject to change the course of your destiny  to improve the days and years ahead?

Every year after Christmas, I write my own obituary.  It is not as sick as it sounds. There are even schools teaching people to do that. But you don’t need such schools to get up to speed. I don’t just sit there fantasize about my inevitable death. No, instead it is normally a solemn moment of reflection of my life up to that point in time. Then I base my future plans (New Year’s resolutions) on what I want my life to become.

Be warned: Some of the methods for succeeding in life that I will teach you over the next few months may be unorthodox and may conflict with your social conditioning. I understand that one man’s meat might be another man’s poison. Ok that is out the way.

What is an Obituary?

An obituary is an attempt to give an account of the texture and significance of the life of someone who has recently died. Many news organizations have on file pre-written obituaries for notable individuals who are still alive.

You don’t have to be dead to have an obituary. It does not have to be written by someone else. In fact I recommend that you regularly write your own obituary as a way of keeping you in check and closer to your true mission in life.

Types of obituaries you should write:

I write two types of obituaries and each serves a different purpose. You should consider writing both types of obituaries regularly or at least once every year.

1. Private - This is where you should give a detailed analysis of your life. Who you really are. Not what people see, but who you really are. This is the obituary that is only known to you and your God. I normally tear up mine right after writing it,  I don’t want it falling on the wrong hands. It is where you map your thoughts and the core of your existence. Be brutally honest about your character and feelings.
2. Public – This is most likely the obituary that will make it to the newspaper pages or on your funeral program. It is how other people see you. Have fun with this one. Think of all the people in your life and think about what they would say about you, publicly, and the thoughts they would have on you in reality. Start with your partner, children, family and close friends.

Reshape your next obituary:

The benefit of writing a living obituary is that you can reshape your next one. You can make changes in your life in different areas to improve yourself. Did you know that only about 10 events, actions or choices determine your destiny? Think of your life so far… how many choices or major actions have determined where you are? I challenge you to find more than 10 major choices.

Below is a list of areas you can reshape your life after stock taking through an obituary.

1. Character

• Who are you? How do you treat people? Are you an honest person? Are you affectionate, ambitious, argumentative, arrogant, courageous, cruel, dependable, frank, industrious, loving or lazy?
• How do others’ perceive you? Have you hurt others? Is there something you can do to improve your relationship with someone you love?
• Do you have a genuine desire to improve some of you negative character traits and improve the positive ones?

2. Family & Friends

• Writing a living obituary will help you focus on who are the key people in your life. Sometimes when chasing success many people tend to ignore family.
• Decide who you want to call family and friends. Keep in touch with them. The greatest gift you can give them is your time and attention. If you are not around very often, always remember to take a camera with you so you can capture those life moments. Those photos and memories may be all you leave them with. Be generous.

3. Contribution

• You should always leave a place better than you found it. Every time you write your own obituary think of the contribution you have made to society, and people you have met. Are you a cheerful giver?
• If you feel that you have not contributed enough to society then make changes in your life. This year I made a decision to launch this blog. I could have chosen to continue making a living online and never show my face or share my true thoughts. But I decided against it after writing my obituary last year. By sharing a part of me, I am better able to inspire people. I want to contribute to the lives of my friends and the internet community and have it as one of my achievements in life.

4. Career

• Many people are classified by the works they did in their lives. What are you doing with your life? Is it something you would be proud to have on your obituary?
• You should follow your passion and use your God given talents to pursue a career that is both rewarding and enjoyable. Use your living obituary to decide what kind of jobs you will take and what career options to pursue. Make sure that whatever you do is congruent with your mission in life.

5. Money

• Money makes the world go round. You don’t want to leave your loved ones with debt if you can avoid it. Every time you write your obituary, ask yourself if you are in a good place financially and if you are doing anything to improve your life and for the people you leave behind.
• Having money will help you do things in life that you would not normally do without money. You can use money to help others and make a difference in people lives. You will be remembered for that long after you die. You may not have the money to leave a big chunk to charity like Bill Gates or the Ford Foundation, but you can work to have enough money to satisfy your needs and give to others in need.
• You can also make a will and estate plans to how your wealth will be distributed once you die. If you have accumulated wealth in your life time, consider writing a will detailing your last wishes. A Will is a document that contains your instructions on how you want your property to be distributed after you have died.

Summary

We have touched on a taboo subject of planning your obituary. Depending on how you look at this subject, you may come up with ideas of what is really is important in life. Sometimes we spend chasing things that don’t matter. I hope this will help you put things in perspective and help you improve your life.

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It has just hit me that this is blog post number 13. Some people have issues with that number, I don’t

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