One of the main reasons for starting this blog is for me to learn ways of aligning my career and activities with the spirit of giving. I want to use my God given talents, life experiences, success and failures to inspire you to be the best that you can be. I have my reasons for doing this and I will share them with you shortly. But first I will share with you a short story from my growing up days in Kenya.

There was a lovely family that lived a few blocks from our house. We were relatively good friends and one day, my sister and I went there for a visit. We had a fabulous time, stayed there all afternoon and even had dinner there. When it came time to go we said our goodbyes and promised to keep in touch. Unfortunately as soon as we walked out, it started raining cats and dogs. We walked back to the house and stood outside the door where we could see everyone inside. It was dark outside and all bright inside. We did not realize it at the time, but our friends could not see us. We watched in disbelief as they tore into our family demonizing us left right and centre. I was shell shocked, how could these people, people we regarded as friends speak such malicious evil? Right after we had such a great time with them?

It is unfortunate that many people will laugh with you, dine with you and then talk nasty behind your back. You probably do that yourself from time to time. I have done it too. It is not a good thing and if we are to rise above mediocrity, we must shun that kind of behavior. It is tempting to bring people down when we are threatened by them. It is easy to want to bring people down if we think they are rising up too fast and leaving us behind.

In Australia, we call it the Tall Poppy Syndrome. Tall Poppy Syndrome is resentment of others’ success. It is something that we need to be aware of and shun as we seek success. If you are planning to be successful, you need to be aware that there are people who will try and bring you down. If you are trying to be successful, spare you energy and focus on what will make you successful instead of wasting time and energy resenting others.

Bringing people down through negative comments and thoughts only hinders your own success. It is a natural trait that we have as humans to want to bring others down, but you should deliberately change this natural urge to a more empowering mindset. The way to do this is by intentionally wanting, wishing and working for the success of others. When others succeed, instead of being jealous, you will be very happy and proud of yourself. It is even better if you can tie your own success to the success of others.

How can you succeed by building others up?

Someone pointed out that I gave an example that drug dealers also provide value to their customers. While it is true that drug dealers provide value in the short term, they ultimately destroy the lives of those same customers. You need to be able to decide how you are going to build others up through your efforts, and whether it is short term or long term. My approach is to focus on how to build others up in the long term.

One of the most successful men in the world today is Bill Gates. I have massive respect for him for his dream, vision, and work of bringing personal computers to the desktops of ordinary families. His company, Microsoft, has been instrumental in building millions of people up by creating software and helping make the PC affordable.

For you to build others up, you have to want it, visualize it and take action. If you are currently thinking of starting a career, you can choose a career that will have a lot of positive impact on others. For example, I was talking to a brilliant engineer friend who wants to use her engineering knowledge to build solar panels and other environmentally friendly solutions. Such an endeavor will help build not just the current generation up, but also future generations.

Succeeding by building others up is akin to planting good seeds. You reap what you sow. If you do a good job for others it will come back to you. For example, if you work hard for your employer and help him achieve his objectives, he may be able to stay in business longer and maybe even give you a pay rise. Whatever your job is, you can do more to improve the fortune of your employer. Do not just do just enough to save your job, go beyond your call of duty to deliver exceptional value.

Building other’s up means that you are self confident about your situation and prospects in life. It means you are grateful for what you have and have a generous spirit to share. This is very important for your success. The more grateful you are, the more success you will attract in your life.

Succeeding by building others up is the most sustainable way of succeeding. If I work really hard to write great articles that will change your life, you are most likely going to keep coming back for more and maybe invite your friends to this site. It is the same in business and other areas of life. If you build other people up, they will be happy with you and spread the word on your behalf saving you big bucks in advertising costs.

Can you succeed if you do not build others up?

Yes you can succeed by being selfish and by destroying other people. Drug dealers do succeed by destroying the long term lives of their customers but that kind of success is not sustainable. Sooner or later it catches up with them.

As Bob Marley used to sing “You can fool some people sometimes, and you can fool some people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time”. It is the same with success, you can succeed sometimes by bringing people down, but you cannot succeed all the time by bringing people down.

An Example of Success through Building Others Up

I love teachers, maybe it has something to do with my dad having been a teacher and the fact that my sister is a teacher. Last Sunday in church they played a video of a dinner discussion between a lawyer and a teacher. As much as I love lawyers too, I thought this video will be a good example of how someone can succeed by building others up. Teachers do an amazing job and we can all learn from them.

Video Transcript

By Taylor Mali
www.taylormali.com

He says the problem with teachers is, “What’s a kid going to learn
from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher?”
He reminds the other dinner guests that it’s true what they say about
teachers:
Those who can, do; those who can’t, teach.

I decide to bite my tongue instead of his
and resist the temptation to remind the other dinner guests
that it’s also true what they say about lawyers.

Because we’re eating, after all, and this is polite company.

“I mean, you¹re a teacher, Taylor,” he says.
“Be honest. What do you make?”

And I wish he hadn’t done that
(asked me to be honest)
because, you see, I have a policy
about honesty and ass-kicking:
if you ask for it, I have to let you have it.

You want to know what I make?

I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could.
I can make a C+ feel like a Congressional medal of honor
and an A- feel like a slap in the face.
How dare you waste my time with anything less than your very best.

I make kids sit through 40 minutes of study hall
in absolute silence. No, you may not work in groups.
No, you may not ask a question.
Why won’t I let you get a drink of water?
Because you’re not thirsty, you’re bored, that’s why.

I make parents tremble in fear when I call home:
I hope I haven’t called at a bad time,
I just wanted to talk to you about something Billy said today.
Billy said, “Leave the kid alone. I still cry sometimes, don’t you?”
And it was the noblest act of courage I have ever seen.

I make parents see their children for who they are
and what they can be.

You want to know what I make?

I make kids wonder,
I make them question.
I make them criticize.
I make them apologize and mean it.
I make them write, write, write.
And then I make them read.
I make them spell definitely beautiful, definitely beautiful, definitely
beautiful
over and over and over again until they will never misspell
either one of those words again.
I make them show all their work in math.
And hide it on their final drafts in English.
I make them understand that if you got this (brains)
then you follow this (heart) and if someone ever tries to judge you
by what you make, you give them this (the finger).

Let me break it down for you, so you know what I say is true:
I make a goddamn difference! What about you?

Summary

No matter what you do in life, whether you are a teacher or a lawyer, a cleaner or a business man, you can succeed by building others up. Find what others need and give them exceptional value. Always ask yourself, “what can I do to build this person or people up?”.

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Attitude Towards Discipline

Many people associate discipline with punishment. When growing up children learn that if they do not do what their parents or teachers want, they will be punished in some way. So they develop an uncanny ability to do just enough to avoid punishment. That ability becomes the genesis of mediocrity.

It is shocking how many people are like that. It is a negative trait that is honed overtime. To rise above mediocrity, you must change your attitude towards discipline.

Discipline means getting more out of yourself and giving your best towards your goal. Think of discipline as a surefire way of getting to your success. Learn to associate discipline with success not punishment.

If you are productive today, then slack off tomorrow, you will only get minimal results. Be disciplined everyday for the best results in your life.

Discipline Training

You can be trained or train yourself to be progressively more disciplined. If you can only concentrate at your job for 1 hour, try and add an extra half an hour. If you become comfortable with that, keep increasing the period until you get full concentration.

The best way to be disciplined is to learn how to set boundaries. Learn to say no to distractions from your goal. It may mean that you will not answer your phone when “in the working zone“. It may mean denying yourself some pleasures or finer things in life or set a limit to your sleeping hours.

Without boundaries, you will just go with the “flow”. Discipline is about taking deliberate action towards your goal not just going with the flow. Define what consists work or actions towards your goal, stick with it and eliminate all else.

Multitasking wastes time especially when switching from one task to another. Progressively train yourself to be more disciplined by  focusing fully on the task at hand.

Practical Discipline Examples

• Physical Health & Fitness – Be disciplined in taking care of your body. Do not just set new years resolutions in January to keep fit then forget it as the year progresses. Discipline means carrying on with your resolutions even when your emotional state has changed. Eat right and keep a regular exercise routine.

• Work – Many people do just enough not to get fired. The average office worker is productive for only half the time they are in the office. Research has shown that many workers spend time in idle socializing, checking email, reading news and other activities not directly related to their job. Set yourself apart by being more disciplined. Improve your productivity, work the required hours everyday and give your best.

• Financial Freedom – Many people read financial freedom books or attend seminars and resolve to change their financial future. But after the dust settles, they get back to the old habits. Financial freedom is a long road, expect to get bored or tired as you go along. Put in place automated systems, e.g. regular savings to help you carry on. Watch the small dollar bills regularly even as you aim for the the big bucks.

• Home & Family – Be disciplined in the amount of time you spend with your family. Be disciplined in taking action and responsibilities at home even when the going gets tough.

• Mind – Keep training your mind, feed it positive thoughts regularly, visit positive websites like this one, regularly. Train your mind to think outside the box. Keep learning new ideas and develop mental strength by stepping out of your comfort zone. Do this regularly.

• Time Management – We only have 24 hours in a day. Learn how to prioritize your activities and stick to a schedule. Do not take on more than you can chew, but when you commit to something, find the most time effective way of following through. If time management does not come naturally for you, train yourself to be more time conscious, productive and/or learn how to delegate.

Summary

Work towards your goal even when the going gets tough.  You will achieve a lot in your life if you stick to your mission day in day out. Don’t keep on falling in and out of love with your passion.

Many of my dear readers have asked me why I stopped writing on a daily basis like I used to. I have no valid reason but a million excuses. It was partially because of laziness, loss of focus,  and an identity crisis. Wow! Now that is off my chest, let us get on with the lessons I learned in 2009.

1)   Give and it will come back to you

I grew up hearing my parents tell me about giving. I heard about the need for giving at our church, as the offering basket did the rounds. But I also heard from friends that we live in a society with “each for himself and God for us all”.

Through sharing my ideas on this blog; inspiring my friends and strangers alike, I was able to attract good things in my life. I was able to meet great friends, make more money and live a richer life. The more I shared, the more I got back in return.

I also noticed  that people and businesses that gave more value succeed more. The bible says “Give and it will come back to you”. We all have spiritual accounts that we deposit into through our acts of giving. The more you deposit the more you can withdraw.

You may think that keeping your money to yourself in times of hardship is the wisest thing. On the contrary, giving opens the floodgates of heaven.

I am just a regular guy not a trained Dr Phil. But I shared the little I knew and it opened the floodgates of blessings that I have attracted to my life.

Be a generous soul in 2010. Giving creates an prosperous mindset. What do you think would happen to your life if you felt rich, abundant, blessed, gifted and prosperous?

2)   Thoughts are Physical

I serialized a couple of books on this blog last year. One of the books was a timeless classic by James Allen. It features the following quote;

“Man is made or unmade by himself; in the armoury of thought he forges the weapons by which he destroys himself; he also fashions the tools with which he builds for himself heavenly mansions of joy and strength and peace. By the right choice and true application of thought, man ascends to the Divine Perfection; by the abuse and wrong application of thought, he descends below the level of the beast. Between these two extremes are all the grades of character, and man is their maker and master.”

Many people (including me), have the habit of letting random thoughts through our minds. We fail to control our thoughts and consciously inject positive ideas.

I learned in 2009 that whatever thought I let in my mind  comes to pass. I will be more vigilant with my thoughts and my words. Because as surely as the sun rises, they come to pass.

3)   Kaizen Opens Doors

I literally stumbled on the concept of Kaizen a few years ago.

Kaizen is the process of reaching your goals in life by harnessing the amazing power of baby steps. It is a simple concept imported from Japan, that can transform your life if you apply it.

If you improved your life by 10% every month, you will not just have 120% better results at the end of the year. The small gradual improvements will compound to give you amazing results.

Kaizen will open doors that would otherwise have remained closed. Whether you want to improve your career, your business, your relationship or your concentration, you can do it through kaizen.

Do not wait for perfection, have a bias for action. Start with small gradual improvements and you will be amazed at the momentum you will gain over time.

When I started blogging, my name was hardly listed in the search engines. With every incremental blog post, I was able to get my site into the search engine databases and attract readers from around the world.

In addition, every blog post helped me improve as a writer and as a person. Small steady steps paid off for me and they can for your life too.

4)   The Art of Personal Branding

A good personal brand increases your perceived value and makes people pay a premium to be associated with you. They may not necessarily pay you money, but they will give you the attention, trust, remembrance, forgiveness and opportunities.

A strong personal brand enables you to be confident in your own abilities and as a person. It helps you become influential in many spheres of life and opens up a world of opportunities.

I learned how to build a personal brand online almost from scratch. Although I had been making a living on the internet for 7 years by the time I started writing on this site, I had been doing so anonymously. So this was new to me.

Personal branding does not happen overnight. Personal branding is about how others view you, not how you view yourself or want to think that others view you. Having said that, you can influence how people perceive you, through your words, actions and habits.

Creating a blog is a fantastic way of enhancing your personal brand online. I wrote about 20 articles on the topic of personal branding, including one on how to use blogging for your personal branding efforts.

5)   Ideas are not worth much

I can spend the rest of my life writing on this blog. I can spend all day researching and coming up with ideas to inspire you. You can spend all day reading and re-reading my blog posts. But if you do not take action, it is all in vain.

This blog was once an idea, but it is only when I put in the hours, to research and to write, that I was able to connect with you and other readers. I am guilty of coming up with ideas in the past that never saw the light of day. I have purposed it in my heart to do more (actions). It is better to implement half your ideas than generate double the ideas without acting on them.

Do you have ideas for doing this or that but never really done it? Take a step of faith in 2010 and keep the excuses at bay. Have a bias for action in the implementation of your ideas.

Summary

2009 was a great year for me. I am grateful for having you as a visitor to my blog and hope to connect with you more in 2010. Please be on the lookout for part two of this article in the next few days. Part two will tell you what really got into me in 2009 and what is in store for 2010.

In January 2009, I set out on a journey of self improvement. I purposed it in my heart to change the trajectory of my life. At that point, my life was in shambles. There were riots in my mind and heart. I needed to quell the uprising within me. The only way to drive out the negative demons was to invite positive angels. It is not easy to change one’s life but I did it; through the grace of God, the power of positive thinking, and the support of friends.

I decided to start this blog with the aim of inspiring my friends to be the best they can be. I realized that the quickest way to grow is by sharing. The genesis of a bumper harvest is sowing the right seeds. The bible says “give, it will come back to you, in good measure, pressed and well shaken”. So I decided to give, and give. I shared my life, my ideas, my pain and my lessons in life. And within a few months, I started seeing amazing results in my life.

My life started improving considerably when I started this blog. I met amazing people who inspired me in many ways.

A few months ago I started asking myself some serious questions.

What if this blog was a community instead of a blog? What if all those anonymous readers were involved in deep conversations with each other?  What if I could come to this blog and learn from the readers instead of me pulling my hairs thinking of what to share?

There is a limit as to how much one person can do in blogging. I want to leave a mark in the lives of more people but my time, experience, knowledge and perspectives are limited. I now ask myself, if only the people who have shared their stories with me in private can share with each other on this website. It would be a good place to hang out, to learn from each other, and to grow as a group and as individuals.

I want to sincerely thank all the people who have supported me this year. I wanted to touch the lives of people but you ended up touching mine. I wanted to inspire you but you ended up inspiring me. You are amazing, you are fabulous. Thanks a million and may God bless you. This blog would not have been what it is without the support and encouragement. I say a big THANK YOU! and hope to work with you closely in 2010 as we build a community of positive thinkers and doers.

I reserve special thanks for Nyomi Graef for the encouragement and helping me brainstorm on the first 20 topics that formed the basis of this blog. I want to thank Paula for the consistent commenting, encouragement and support. I want to thank Mwangi for getting me to take action and just do it (launch blog). I want to thank Philip for the countless hours of editing. A big thank you goes to Joy for believing in me and constant inspiration. To Kibe Gitau I say thank you for your encouragement, and I wish you a successful 2010 and beyond. And finally a big thank you to my Facebook friends for the support, and passing word out about the blog.

To the people listed below, I want to say a big thank you for your positive messages, giving me a reason to write, and a reason to build the community site that I am working on for 2010. May the light shine in your lives, and may success be yours for generations.

Abdullatif Manjothi

Abiodun oluwaseun

Afolabi Albert

aileen veleci

aisha

akams

Alen

Alen Wekesa

alfred

alice ngalla

alicia

Allan inc.

allan lucumay

amakay

amelia mwendwa

Amo

Amos

andrew muasya

Andrew Njuguna

andrson

Anes Mohamed

Angeey

angeline

Ann Kibunja

Anne

Anthony

Antony Mbugua

Antony Mbugua Ngari

ANTONY NGARI

Aoll

Arsento

Atef

Atieno,South Korea

Austine viera

ayo FADUMIYE

babu

Ben Gathogo

Ben k.

Benn

Benn Rono

bestgirls.com.ua

Bikundo

Billy Ombima

Birech

Bob Bong

Bob Skilnik

Bonnie

Boston Gym

boyfulani

BRENDA NJERI

Brenda Njeru

Bunmi

carol

Carol Achieng Otieno

CAROLYN

Cate

Catherine

Cathy Nyawira

cecilia kabura

Cee

Charity

Charity G

Charles

charles oloo

Charles Simba

chegepreneur

Chike Ibe

Chris Perry

christine magati

christine pamba

Ciru Mansur

Colin

Cornelius

damaris

Dan Gicharu

Dan kavole

Dan Mahiri

Dan Schawbel

DANIEL

Daniel ‘Jeshi-X’ Ngari

Daniel Gicharu

Daniel Ngari

DANN KIMANI

Daudi

David Hamilton

David Kamau

David M

Deer

Dennis Muchiri

Diana

dickson mwangangi

Doba

Dobah

dorcas

Downunderhater

Edu

eimong

Elly

Emile

Emily A.

Eric M

Eric muema Kiilu

ERICAH KIPTOO

essie

Esther

Esther Kinene

Eston

Eva Kamiri

Evah

Fahreen

Faiza

felicia

Felix

ford sink

fred michori

Fred Nyakundi

funmi fasunloye

Gabriel

Gabriel Kemboi

Gabriel Olofu

Gathoni Kimuyu

George

George Mutale

Georgia Atieno

Gicharu

Giny-D

gitau

Gladys

Gladys Maina

gloriathomas

Goals / Resolutions

Godfrey.C.Osakwe

GOOD WORK

Gorata

grace

Harry

Hildah

Humphrey Mburu

i.ali

Ibe Arua

Ibrahim

Ifects

ij

Ikechukwu Anthony Nwaodu

Iman

Iman Ali

Irene

IRENE KORIR

Irene Y

irungu

irungu wagura

Jacinta Wambui

jackie

Jafeni

jafeni karanja

James Adolwa

James Court

James Gitau

james karuku

James Muriuki

james mwendwa kivuva

Jamez

Jamleck

jane

jane wangari

janet

janet mutuku

Jazz

jbw

Jedz

jemimah

Jeri

Jesse Obukhor

Job kungu

Joe and Wanda

Joe Gichuki

JOEY W.

John

john kaburi

John Makau

john mwangi

John Onyango Rare

John Rare

John Tedesco

Joram

Joseh

Joseph

Joseph Karuga

Josephine Macharia

Joses

Joses Loltome

Josphine njeri

Joy

Joy. kehinde

JOYCE

JT

Jude A

Jude A.

Judy

juliana mburu

Juliet

june

justyna daniel-akpan

kachwanya

kadani

Kageniii

kahora

kaibs

kainvestor

kamama

Kamau Warui

kami

kami wa nyina wa macua

Kanai

Kanja Paul

karanja

karanja kamotho

Karen

karuga

KAY

Ken

Ken Mwangi

Kennedy Kamau

KenyaLuv

Kepher

Kevin Kute

kibe gitau

kim anointted

Kimaku

Kip

kiplangat

Kristjan-Olari Leping

Kuria Steve

kybs

lawrence jonga

Leila

Lilian B K

Linda

Linda K. Mugo

Linda Obilo

Linet Kerubo

Lisa

Liz

lloyd kikunzu

lorna

louise nyaboke

lucie

Lucy Mundia

lucynd

Lydia

Lydia Muriithi

lynne

lynnette

Lyre

m. mwangi

m.ali

m.mwangi

Macharia

Manciny NeeMoh Migwi

Mandi

Marcel Masaga

Maria

Martha

Martin Muchira

Martin W

Marto

Mary

mavis

max

Mayoress

mel

Meli

mercy

Mia

Michael

michael m g

MICHAEL MURITHI

Michael Mwaniki

michelle m

mike

mike kamanu

millionaires of genesis

Milly

Miriam Ruff

Moboh

molara

Molly

Morris

Moses Kimani

Moses Waruiru

Motivational

Mukonyo

Mumbi

munga

munysara

Muthoka

Mutuma Timothy

MWALIMU

mwangangi

Mwangi

Mwangi – the Displaced African

Myrna A. Niedo

Nancy

NANCY KARIUKI

Narasha

Natalee Bangkok Hotels

Natty Dread

natural sleep aids

Ndiang’ui

Ndiku

ndugi

nelie

nellie

Nelly

Nelson

Nganga

nganga wa karuku

Ngige Benson

nich

Nicholas Kimani

Nick Tumbo

Nimo

Nisa

Njau

njeri

Noha

Nwaodu Anthony Ikechukwu

Nya

nyayiemi

Nyomi

Nyomi Graef

Obamayowa

onesmus makori

Pam

Parto

Patricia Kanja

PATRICK

Patrick Odhiambo

patrick okumu m.

Paul Gitonga

PAUL NGO’NG’A

Paula

Paula May

Pauline Mwaniki

Perminus

Peter Mburu

Peter Nduati

Peter Ngunyi

Phases

Philip D.W.N

philip w

Philip w.n.

phoebe

Prince Miyake

Prince Sioni

QUEEN-ANNE BALOGUN

racheal wangari Njeru

Rachel

Rachel Akinyi

RaiulBaztepo

Rajab

Rebecca Munga

regina

Renee M

Renee Mburu

reu

reuben

reuben lagat

Richard Ollor

Richardinah

Robert Echa

Robert Wilkins

Rofem

ronald

Ronald Earl Wilsher

ronald n.ngugy

rosemary njeri

Roy

rubby

saeed

sally

salome

Sam

Scimmo

SHADRACK

Shiroh

Shiru

shomyz

simon

simon  kanoga

simon kanoga

simon wachira

SK Usman

slimjess

Sophie

stan

Steve

Steve Kybs

steve nick

Steve Njau (Kybs)

Sublimity

Sulaiman

Sumi Akumu Assumpter

susan

Susannah

sush

symo

Tamaku

tghttxhosy

thaka

Thuo

Tj

Tola

Tom

Tom Kabau

Tom Miller

Tommy Adebayo

Toni

tony

tony ngari

victor

Victoria Zillah

victoria zilllah

Vikky

vivianne nancee

wamahium

Wanja

Wanjiru

WeddingChecklist

william

Wilson Odhiambo

Winnie

Woji Christian C.

xtine

Xtine Dida

Yomi Oloko

Yvonne Ndunge

Zippy

P/s: If you have not had the chance to read all the blog posts, please take your time to read them and share them with friends. I would love to hear from you. Merry Christmas and Happy 2010!!

Black and Gold is a value for money generic brand for hundreds of essential items on supermarket shelves in Australia. Yet few affluent people will be caught with black and gold products on their shopping baskets. It makes me ask myself, why is it that people world over are willing to pay a premium for beefed up brands. How can you beef up your personal brand? Why should you?

1 – Influence

A powerful personal brand can help you get things done. People respond to prestige and powerful personal brands. You will be harder to ignore and your opinions will count. One of the most powerful personal brands is Oprah Winfrey.

Oprah is an American media personality, Academy Award nominated actress, producer, literary critic and magazine publisher, best known for her self-titled, multi-award winning talk show.

She is regarded as the most influential woman on earth. She has the power to cause enormous market swings and radical price changes with a single comment. Her endorsement of Barrack Obama is said to have added over 1 million votes to his vote basket. An obscure book quickly moves to best seller status once she reviews it on her book club.

You may not have the influence to rival Oprah, but revving up your personal brand will make you more influential in your area of life. Being influential enables you to get things done seemingly effortless. Developing a powerful personal brand takes time but it is worth it, just on this one count.

Charismatic preachers who start mega-churches first develop a strong personal brand. They plan in detail how their brand is going to be defined, communicated, represented, extended, associated etc. They reap the benefits of having strong brand through loyalty and become very influential on the lives of their congregation.

Pay attention to your brand image and you will increase your influence in your family, career, business and social situations.

2 – Attention

The world has become a busy place. We are constantly interrupted by thousands of advertising messages daily. Many people have a wide selection of things they could be doing at any one time. I feel privileged that you are reading this blog. Attention is scarce and businesses (and blogs) have to constantly work hard for a slice of your attention.

If you have a generic brand you will be ignored; you will be just another commodity. If you want to command attention and remain relevant, develop your personal brand. People with good personal brands are sought highly sought after and given attention.

3 – Trust

A known quantity is easier to trust than a wild card. If people know what you stand for, they are more likely to trust you than an unknown person. When Americans’ travel abroad, many trust McDonald’s food more than local food outlets in foreign countries, even though they might not eat much fast food at home.

People love and trust those they are familiar with. Developing a good brand within your target market helps you gain trust. Without trust it is hard to get business or meaningful relationships.

4 – Opportunities

When people know what you represent, they bring to your attention relevant information, opportunities and contacts. If you are known as a good web designer, people will refer their friends to you when they need websites.

A powerful personal brand helps you interact with valuable contacts that would have perhaps ignored without a strong personal brand. Developing a powerful brand opens a lot of doors and brings opportunities to your door step.

5 – Competition

In a competitive society you need to differentiate yourself to get ahead. A good personal brand helps in your differentiation efforts. You will always win over weaker and inconsistent brands if you take time to nurture your personal brand.

Google developed a powerful brand by focusing on quality search results and a minimalist approach to their page design. Google tops the Brandz list of most powerful brands in the world and is said to be worth $100 billion. Google’s brand image has enabled it to fight off deep pocketed competition such as Microsoft to retain its search business market share.

Investing in a powerful personal brand will be handy for you down the line to keep the competition at bay.

6 – Leverage

Richard Branson has leveraged the Virgin brand highly. The brand name “Virgin” arose when Branson and a partner were starting their first business, a record shop. They considered themselves virgins in business.

According to his book “Losing my Virginity”; Richard Branson is no longer a virgin in business but a successful entrepreneur. He has extended his brand to Virgin Records, Virgin Games, Virgin Atlantic Airways, Virgin Holidays, Virgin Trains, Virgin Mobile, Virgin Cosmetics, Virgin Money, and Virgin Mega stores amongst others.

Tiger Woods perfected his brand image as a top golf player and all round good guy. He now has leveraged his brand to get endorsements for many products earning him hundreds of millions of dollars. The sky is the limit once you have a powerful brand.

Once you are known as an authority in one thing, it is easier to leverage your brand to do something else. Do not try to be a jack of all trades at first. Focus on one core area and build your name, then use that to spring on to something else, then something else after that.

7 – Memorability

The King of Rock ‘n’ Roll, Elvis Presley died in August 1977; he had many admirers and critics. More than 30 years after his death he is still regarded as an icon and his estate is still making money that would put many living artistes to shame.

If you are an average generic brand, people will forget you as soon as you are out of sight. People make an effort to remember those who they perceive as worth the effort; those who represent value.

You may not really care about being remembered after you die, but being forgotten as soon as you walk out the door can cost you opportunities and relationships when you are still here on earth with us. Developing a strong personal brand will make people remember you and perpetuate your legacy.

8 – Perceived Value

Having a strong personal brand will increase people’s perception of what you bring to the table. People are generally self serving and will seek to interact with those they regard as good value. Perception is everything, it is the new reality.

You will be treated as people perceive you. It is therefore imperative that you develop a good brand, and communicate with others, letting them know, perhaps in subtle ways, what your brand is about.

In his book, The Idea Virus, Seth Godin says that “it’s the idea of Air Jordan sneakers, not the shoe that permits Nike to sell them for more than $100. It’s the sizzle, not the fit. The idea makes Nike outsized profits.”

What brand image are you communicating with the world? Are you selling the shoe or the sizzle? Are you perceived as being of high value?

9 – Loyalty

With an array of choice, consumers could pretty much pick a different brand of biscuits or ice cream from supermarkets, but after a while, they settle down on a handful of brands.  It is like that in relationships, people end up being loyal to a select few friends. If you develop a reputation as a good friend, as a good brand, you are more likely to attract loyalty.

Smart companies realize that they get the most value from repeat business than in constantly paying for advertising to get new customers. If you develop a good personal brand, people are more likely to stick with you for the long term. There are life long benefits of building a strong brand.

Many people are not willing to pay the cost of switching. They stick with familiar brands and resent new brands. They would rather stay at their comfort zone. Having a good personal brand will position you in people’s comfort zone.

10 – Forgiveness

Sometimes things do not work out as planned. If something goes wrong or you mess up, you are more likely to be forgiven if you had developed a consistent brand image. People might be more likely to understand, forgive and give you a second chance if you have a good personal brand. But don’t count on it; try not to mess up.

11 – Confidence

You will walk with your head high when people recognize and respect your personal brand. If your brand reputation precedes you, it will open doors and make life easier. A good brand earns respects and does wonders to one’s confidence.

A good personal brand will give you a level of control on outcomes. Knowing what to expect or how people will react to you is confidence inspiring. This confidence is able to manifest itself in other areas of your life, further enhancing your personal brand.

Summary

I hope you have been inspired to beef up your personal brand. A good personal brand increases your perceived value and makes people pay a premium to be associated with you. They may not necessarily pay you money, but they will give you the attention, trust, remembrance, forgiveness and opportunities.

A strong personal brand enables you to be confident in your own abilities and person. It helps you become influential in many spheres of life and opens up a world of opportunities.

I would love to hear from you about how a good personal brand has worked for you or anyone that you know. Thanks in advance.

Whether in business or social situations, people take an average of 3 seconds to evaluate and rank others. If someone perceives you to be of lower status than them, they will treat you with indifference, disdain or outright hostility. If you are perceived to be of higher status, you will be accorded respect, adoration, mild worship and regarded as a valuable contact.

In relationships, people struggle and stress about making a good first impression; and for good reason. The first few seconds of a couple meeting can be the deal maker or deal breaker. It can mean the difference between going north and going south. There are tricks from the seduction community that seem to work like a charm, but long term relationships are by and large determined by those first seconds.

An interview panel is likely to judge a book by its cover as soon as the interviewee walks in. Many people decide at a glance if they are going to do business with you or not. What you say after they see you might not really make them change their mind. It is sad but true. We can sit back and moan this fact or we can rise up and do something about it. Let us look at a few ways of making those 3 seconds count.

1 – Smile

Richard Branson was once called the “grinning pullover”. He is a happy fellow who smiles a lot more than his fellow billionaire Donald Trump.

Smiling quickly puts people at ease. It is an easy way of improving the first impression. Smiling makes one look more attractive. Attractive people have an easier time attracting attention. Smile and make people attentive.

2 – Be Yourself

Have you seen the movie “Meet the Parents”? If you have you probably know how awkward it looks when someone is trying to put on an act when faced by unfamiliar situations.

If you can help it, be yourself. Let people see the real you. If you find yourself trying to change yourself to fit in, ask yourself the following questions.

• Is it worth it for me to put on a front?
• Am I hanging out with the wrong people?
• Is there a better way of reaching my goals without being a fake?
• What do I need to change for me to fit in naturally?
• Who am I? What do I represent?

3 – Always on Time

If you mean business do not be late for meetings. It leaves a sour taste in the mouths of those you keep waiting. Being on time will add a few points and being late will subtract the little goodwill you might have had.

Do your best to respect other people’s time. Plan in advance. Schedule meetings and set reminders. Develop a reputation of being a good time manager. If you are currently not good with time, start small. Be early for your next meeting, then the next, and then the next one. With time, that will become a habit and come to you effortlessly.

4 – Presentation

How you present yourself to others will dramatically influence how they view you. Personal grooming and lifestyle have a big impact on first impressions.

A few years ago, I hailed a taxi on St George’s Terrace in Perth, Western Australia. I was wearing an Italian business suit that would have made tailors in Italy proud of me.

The taxi driver stopped and took me around town as I handled my business. I felt like Tom Cruise in the movie “Collateral”. The only difference was that my weapon of choice was sharp dressing and good presentation.

The taxi driver looked at me for 3 seconds and instantly trusted me. He drove me around and a few times I left his taxi to go to my marathon appointments around town. He patiently waited in the car with nothing more than my promise to be back. I got back and gave him a healthy tip.

The next day was a Friday. I went to Northbridge, Western Australia with a couple of my Kenyan friends. After a few hours of clubbing we got tired and tried to catch a taxi home. All the taxis zoomed past us, completely ignoring us. It sure felt different from the previous day’s treatment.

Finally one taxi drive stopped, looked at us for 3 seconds and demanded money upfront which is not the norm in Western Australia. You see my friend; here we were three black guys dressed in jeans and T-Shirts in Northbridge on a Friday night. We looked “suspicious”. Are you “suspicious” looking? Do you hang out in “suspicious” places?

5 – Preparation

People will brand you with what you present to them the first time you meet. You may have an arsenal of personality traits. What trait do you choose to bring to the table today? Preparation can help you adapt your personality traits for the situation. This does not mean being fake. It means choosing what side of you to emphasize.

If you are going for meetings you need to prepare and do your part. Nothing makes someone look unprofessional like lack of preparation. You have been warned.

6 – Confidence

The way you walk, the way you talk and present yourself is impacted by your level of confidence. Seek to develop your self confidence. It will make a big difference in how you interact with others and how they perceive you.

 Even the way you shake people’s hands or address them can reveal how confident you are. Confidence is a first impression masterstroke.

Summary

First impressions are very hard to erase. If making a lousy first impression is going to cost you relationships and opportunities, then you need to change how you approach this issue.

The first impression is the first point of interaction with your personal brand and you should do your utmost best to make it the best.

I would love to hear your experiences and thoughts about first impressions. Your comments are most welcome.

Cheers.

Today we kick off the sports series. We look at what we must really avoid; scoring an own goal.

An own goal occurs in football and other goal-scoring games when a player scores a goal that is registered against his or her own team. It is usually accidental, and may be a result of an attempt at defensive play that failed or was spoiled by opponents. Own goals occur in our lives either by accident, error on our part or outside influence. Own goals can cost us success and so we shall look at ways of minimizing the potential of own goals. We shall also look at what to do in the event that we score an own goal.

Imagine watching your favorite football team play at the highest level. You have been following the team and they are undefeated. You are pretty sure that they shall win the cup. Then during extra time, one of your team’s players kicks or is kicked by the ball and the referee calls it a goal. How would you feel? Imagine the pain, feel the pain… that is the pain you should be feeling every time you sabotage your own success. We sabotage our success in a million ways but 99.9% of the time we are oblivious to it. We do not feel the pain until it is too late. We need to see the signs; we need to know the triggers of self sabotage.

Let us look at some ways we can score own goals; sabotaging our success. We shall also look at pitfalls to avoid.

1. Physical Health and Wellness
2. Work and Careers
3. Financial Freedom
4. Home and Family
5. Social and Relationships
6. Mind and Character
7. Spiritual Life

1 – Physical Health and Wellness

Many people score an own goal in the area of physical health. It is said that you are what you eat. If you eat fatty food, you will get fat. If you do not eat a balanced diet, you may be sabotaging your long term health and ability for your body to fight diseases.

Sitting down all day (even when working on your computer) counts as an own goal. You need to exercise your body daily. Find some physical activities to do and make it part of your daily habits.

Own goals happen accidentally, and so do accidents. If you do not have health insurance you may be limiting your ability to afford quality health care. You can avoid financial devastation for you and your loved one by taking on insurance.

Smoking may look cool in the movies but if you do not pay attention to the ministry of health warnings on cigarettes, you may be doing more than scoring an own goal. You may be burning your lungs and inducing cancer. Drugs and alcohol also limit your health and should be avoided.

2 – Work and Careers

Ever heard of the saying “find what you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life?” If you are working in a job you hate just to pay the bills, you may be limiting your creativity and output. That is self sabotage. You cannot thrive unless you do what you love and what you are enthusiastic about.

Another way that people sabotage themselves professionally is by taking cover on the mental illusion called job security. Thinking that you have a secure job and sitting pretty on your comfort zone is a time bomb.

Talking of comfort zones, if you are not actively building your professional network, you may be limiting yourself. Think up of a good contacts building strategy that suits you and work it.

There are many other ways of scoring an own goal in your professional life. For example, bad time management skills, low productivity at work, lack of specialization, procrastination, lack of focus , and falling for distractions e.g. Facebook at work.  If you have any of those items in your professional world, consider yourself warned before someone shouts “Gooooooooooooool!”

3 – Financial Freedom

If you aspire to be financially free, you do not want to have an own goal in the financial arena, do ya? Make sure you gain financial literacy or/and get sound financial advice from professionals.

One of the ways many people meet their financial waterloo is by trying to keep up with the Joneses. Have your own financial plan that is independent of what your friends think or are doing. Focus more on saving and investing as opposed to free spending. Build assets instead of liabilities. Increase your income and lower your expenses. Find financial common sense that happens to be not so common with many.

Do not sabotage your financial future by thinking, investing or planning for the short term and forgetting the long term. Financial intelligence says that those who invest for the long term get the power of compounding working for their favor. Start investing early, do not fall for the fallacy that you will invest more, later when you have better income.

Always remember that money is the medium of exchange of value. The more value you deliver, the more money you make. Focus on delivering value efficiently and deliver it to many people. That is why movie stars and elite athletes get paid a lot. They provide astounding entertainment to millions of people. The more people you can provide value to, the more you will get paid.

I will not name names but I have met people who have sabotaged themselves financially because of what their parents said about money. If you grew up believing that money is the root of all evil and that all rich people are devil worshiping evil incarnates, then you need to flush those thoughts away. You need to fill your mind with a positive attitude to money. Money, just like humans, likes to live where it is appreciated. Clean up your mind to receive financial freedom and money will come. If you try attracting money before, it will elude you without even telling you why.

The worst own goal you can have in the area of money and finances is getting too much of it before you are ready. They say that a fool and his money are soon parted. Do not be the fool who wins lotto and is homeless five years later. Get a good financial education and prepare yourself mentally for success.

4 – Home and Family

A family that prays together stays together. A family that spends time together will have more opportunities for bonding and growing than one that spends time apart. Do not sabotage a good family life by avoiding your family members. Remember that we need balance in life. No matter who your relatives or family members are, create time for them. Improve your listening skills, be more empathetic and improve communication with your family members.

At the end of life, you do not want to look back and count how many opportunities you missed for bonding with your family. Instead, create opportunities for bonding with your family members and bring your digital camera with you. Take photos of weddings, funerals, parties or even just random moments with your family members. Those photos can be your treasured memories of your loved one when they are no longer around.

Creating a family financial blueprint can help a family move ahead in life. If you have kids create a saving plan for their education and consider taking more insurance, and setting money aside for rainy days.

One other type of own goals you can score in the family front is family disputes. You can avoid family disputes by managing expectations. Do not make promises you cannot keep. Set your boundaries and let your family members know where you stand on issues. Be loving but firm.

5 – Social and Relationships

It may look like fun stretching your neck to reach out for the greener end on the other side but betrayal in a relationship is one of the worst own goals you can score. If someone entrusts you with their heart and trust, do not abuse it.

Have you ever realized that the people around you have quite an impact on you over the long term? Choose carefully who you associate with. Choosing the wrong company of friends can bring an avalanche of negativity to your life that can have cascading effects in all spheres of your life.

Sweeping things under the carpet and not addressing them when they arise is setting yourselves up for future failure. Believe me you do not want to do that. Make sure you address issues. Do not go to bed angry with each other. Stay up and fight J

There is always the temptation of comparing your loved one to others. Do not do it. There will always be someone “better” than you wife or husband out there. Comparing your relationship with that of others just fuels lack of satisfaction and diminishes the quality of your life. Focus on improving your own relationship instead of obsessing over your friends’ relationships.

6 – Mind and Character

Use it or lose it. The more you use your brain the sharper it becomes. Challenge yourself constantly. Allowing yourself to sit on a comfort zone is a recipe for an own goal. Focus on growing your mind and character. Associate with people who will help you grow, read books or watch DVDs that will help you grow. Spend your time on the internet on websites and blogs that inspire you to be the best you can be J

Integrity is the undivided or unbroken completeness or totality with nothing wanting. Aspire to be a man or woman of integrity. Develop your character to have honor and integrity even when nobody is looking. Karma is a bitch, what you give to others comes back to you.

Another area of the mind and character that you should safe gourd and avoid an own goal is reputation. Take your reputation seriously. It takes years to build and moments to rip to shreds. Avoid compromising situations that might cost your good name.

And finally on the area of mind, work on your level of confidence. The higher your confidence, the higher you will soar in life. Eliminate the own goal called self doubt. Believe in yourself. Use positive affirmations daily to tell yourself that “yes you can!” You only achieve as much as you believe you can. Never more.

7 – Spiritual Life

We have not talked much about the issue of religion and spirituality on this blog. Allow me to add my two cents on this topic.

Religion can be an own goal for your success. If you let religion restrict your free thought and social interactions, it may cost your success here on earth. Perhaps that is not important for you. But if it is, be sure to use religion judiciously.

On your spiritual journey, you may find that certain friends or circumstances limit you. Think about it and make a choice that you can live with. Old habits die hard, you may want to kill off some habits to achieve success in the spiritual arena.

One last point on religion; some religions introduce divergent views on success that may make you not live congruently. Religion and success are very individual things. Find what is acceptable for you and stick with it. Find answers to questions such as Is money evil? Is prosperity gospel fine by me? Find those answers before you set out looking for a financial fortune. Avoid all elements of personal incongruence caused by religious teachings. Chart a path between your religion and your other areas of life. Do not be driven by fear but by a sound mind.

Summary

This has been a long article warning us about scoring an own goal in various areas of our lives. Own goals have signals and I hope this article has helped you spot the signs of own goals and has given you ideas on how to tackle the challenges.

Scoring an own goal is not the end of life. We all make mistakes. If you are reading this article it means you are of sound mind and you can have another chance to keep playing in the game of life and success.

I sincerely wish you well in your life. This blog’s purpose is to inspire you to be the best you can be. This series in particular will use sports analogies to inspire you. If you know someone, a friend, colleague or family members that would be inspired by this blog, please consider sharing it with them.

I would love to hear your comments about issues discussed in this article or anything I may have left out. Cheers my friend!

Since we are dealing with the mind in this series, I think it would be prudent of me to share with you what I have recently learned about happiness and how it is connected with the mind.

Happiness is a state of well-being characterized by emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. The quickest way of being happy is to decide to be happy. Tell your mind to be happy. Do not put conditions to your being happy. Just resolve to be happy today, not in future.

Many personal development or self improvement blogs such as this one, and even books, seminars, tapes and workshops teach you ways of attaining success. They propose that following their doctrine will make you happy. Fortunately for you and I, there is a faster way of being happy, and that is by conditioning your mind to be happy.

You do not need to drive a Ferrari to be happy. You do not need to married to be happy. You do not need to have a degree to be happy. You do not need to be out of debt to be happy. You do not need to be in good physical condition or health to be happy.

I have found myself postponing my happiness many times in my life. I told myself that I will be happy once I score highly in my high school exams. I told myself that I will be happy when I graduate. Then I told myself that I would be happier when I start my own business, get a life partner or buy this or that.

Unfortunately as I achieved one goal in my life, there was always something more to do. For years I traded my present happiness for the hope of a better tomorrow. Many ambitious people like me end up making that mistake. Have you been limiting your present happiness until you achieve a goal or something happens? Have you postponed your happiness my friend?

I started this blog to be able to inspire my friends to be the best they can be. But I have other goals for it too. I want this blog to become popular. I want people to know about it, visit and leave comments. I want to build a thriving online community around this blog, for like minded fellows like you and me to meet, discuss what is happening in our lives and encourage each other. However, it is not an easy job. I have to put in hours upon hours, maybe even years, to make it all happen. I could postpone my happiness to the day my ideas and hopes become reality. But instead I choose to be happy today. I choose to be happy that YOU are reading this today. It is easier and better for me to rejoice with each new reader or commenter on this blog, than to wait for a million visitors that may or may never come.

Let us now look at how you can have a quick path to happiness in a few areas of life.

1) Health & Wellness

Many people who are out of shape (read fat or obese) postpone their happiness until after they get to their weight goals. It may take months or years to reach your desired goals in how you look. Why waste that time by being unhappy, in the hope you will be happy once you lose the weight? Many fat people avoid socializing, buying themselves nice clothes and being confident. They tell themselves that one day soon, they will live their dream life and be happy. If you are in that position my friend, my advice is really simple. Quit dreaming and be happy today. Life is too short to be lived in future tense.

2) Work (Jobs & Careers)

It is very easy to postpone happiness until you get a particular job or career. It is also very easy to postpone happiness to until you quit your job if you are unhappy with it.

We spend at least a quarter of our lives working every day. Why be unhappy at the job? Why ruin 25% of your life with something you can mentally control (in many cases)? You can control whether to be happy or not. It is a state of mind. Look at the glass as being half full in regards to your job and you may increase your happiness.

3) Financial Freedom

I believe that money can buy happiness if you know where to shop. But I also believe that in some cases, the money we come across the more problems we get. The best you can do is to de-link your happiness from the size of your bank account. It is easier said than done, but always bear in mind that you are not your money. You will still exist even without money. Be happy even when you have crippling debt. Have a plan for financial freedom and work to meet your financial goals and obligations, but do not let money come between you and happiness. You deserve more out of life.

4) Home & Family

You do not have to wait until you buy your own home for you to be happy. You can be happy whether you are married, single, with or without kids. Strive to be happy regardless of the home or family situation. Do not postpone your happiness until you make major strides in your home and family life.

5) Relationships

Relationships are like butterflies. They go through different phases and cycles. Learning to be happy at each phase of a relationship can save a relationship and even help the relationship thrive. What kind of relationships are you in (friendships included)? Are you happy or are postponing your happiness?

What a Fisherman Taught A Wall Street Guru about Happiness

I was once told a story about a Wall Street guru who made a bunch of money and decided to take a holiday to a Caribbean Island with his family.

He met a fisherman who showed him and his family around the Island. They got to talk about various issues. The Wall Street professional told the fisherman that if only he was ambitious like him, he would achieve a lot in his life.

Wall Street Guy: If I were you, I would get a couple of people to help me with the work, sell the fish to a bigger merchant, re-invest the profits and get a second boat, then maybe a third and a fourth boat.

Fisherman: Oh man! And what would you do with all them boats?

Wall Street Guy: I would be making so much money and would use some of that money to find out all I can about selling to bigger markets like the United States.

Fisherman: That’s one big market. It would be very tiring selling to all those people.

Wall Street Guy: You won’t have to get tired, in fact you could go to the bank and borrow against your business and expand it with other people’s money.

Fisherman: I fear other people’s money. I won’t sleep well at night if I owe people money.

Wall Street Guy: A lot of people run their businesses with other people’s money. You could even make a killing by listing on the stock market and retire rich.

Fisherman: What kind of money are we talking about here?

Wall Street Guy: Millions. Untold millions.

Fisherman: And what would you do if you had those millions?

Wall Street Guy: I would retire to a nice island with my family, spend my time relaxing and fishing.

Fisherman: And why do you want me to go to all that trouble just to end up where I am, doing exactly what I am doing?

Sometimes we take the long road to happiness. You may be chasing the wind with some dreams. Take a moment to reflect on what will really make you happy. Cut the fluff and just be happy. The road to happiness does not have to be that long.

Summary

A beautiful mind is one that gets results. Many people do things to either avoid pain or gain pleasure. In other words people do things in order to be happy. Do yourself a favor and find the quickest way to happiness. Hint: It is all in the mind.

What is Love?

There are a million and three ways of defining love. Love is a strong positive emotion of regard and affection. It is a deep feeling of sexual desire and attraction. According to the bible, Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful.

What is Appreciation?

Appreciation is an expression of gratitude. It is the understanding of the nature or meaning or quality or magnitude of something. Appreciation is the opposite of taking things for granted. You can appreciate the good that others do. You can appreciate what your loved one, employee, employer, friend or parent does.

How to Show Love

• Empathy – You can show love to someone by understanding them and seeing things from their perspective. Putting yourself in someone’s shoes is a brilliant way of showing your love.
• Speak Love – Tell your partner that you love them. Say the magic words. Let them hear you say it.
• Time - Time is a finite resource. Spending time with someone is a great way of showing love. Do not do disappearing acts on those you love. Spending quality time with the one you love helps them feel special.
• Communication – Talk openly, clearly and firmly with those you love. Do not give them conflicting messages. Set clear boundaries of what can or cannot be done and communicate that as clearly as possible. Use communication to manage expectations to avoid disappointments.
• Actions – Actions speak louder than words. Show love by doing what you are expected to do, and beyond. Walk the talk.
• Honesty – Be brutally honest with those you love. There is nothing that erodes love as fast as broken trust.
• Affection – Depending on your culture or relationship, you can demonstrate your love through affection, either privately or publicly (PDA).
• Gifts - Giving gifts is a good way of showing love. Give out of love and do not expect something in return. Do not give gifts only when you are obligated to give such as birthday or holidays.
• Hour of Need – Be there at the hour of need when your friend or loved ones needs you. There is nothing worse than the feeling of being forsaken at the hour of need. Be careful not to be perceived as a fair weather friend.
• Complements - Give genuine complements to your loved one. It is a good way of building that warm feeling and confidence. Learn the difference between flattery and genuine complements.
• Compromise – Be flexible and willing to meet half way. Do not insist on only having your way. Do not let them walk all over you either.
• Forgiveness – Do not hold grudges for longer than you have to. Learn to let go and forgive people for wrong doing. Give your loved one wiggle space if they find themselves on the wrong. Do not make them feel cornered. Give them a soft landing and an opportunity to rectify their  mistakes.

How to Show Appreciation

• Be creative – Do not do what is expected all the time. Take time to think of ways of showing appreciation, depending on what the person did. Appreciation does not have to be complex or expensive.
• Tell them – The best way of appreciating someone is to tell them that you do. Be specific on what you are thanking them for.
• Spend Time – Spend time with people you appreciate.
• Recognition – Recognize people for their good deeds publicly or within your circle of friends. Genuine recognition can be a fuel for more good deeds.
• Focus on the good side – Focus on the positive aspect of their actions. Talk about it with them, highlight what you like, and they may continue doing more of that.
• Thank you notes – Send follow up thank you notes to people who go out of their way to make you happy or perform exceptional service.

Summary

Love one another, and appreciate those who do  good things. Appreciation is one of the deepest of human desires. Showing love and appreciation attracts good things to your life. Be more proactive in showing love and appreciation.

I would love to hear of ways that you have used to show love or appreciation. Please post your comments (be specific on what kind of actions you took or recommend).

Fear prevents action and modifies behavior in ways that slow down your journey to victory. Fear has its good side; it just needs to be put in its right place.

Benefits of Fear

1) Survival – Fear helps us see another day. Without fear we would walk right onto an oncoming train or play with dangerous snakes. Without fear we would be recklessly putting our lives on the line. Without fear we would be having unprotected sex with strangers. Rational fear is good and promotes our survival.

2) Excitement – Extreme sports provide an adrenaline rush that is exhilarating and exciting. Living dangerously is fun; not boring at all. I want to get a motor bike and my family and friends tell me that I will die if I do that. I fear that but it still tremendously excites me to perform dangerous stunts with a motor bike. Maybe I should first blog first before getting one, just in case.

According to psychologist Arthur Aaron, fear creates sexual excitement. Stuff happens when people curl up after watching a horror movie. Stuff happens when people are in new cites, getting lost, away from their comfort zones. Fear can provide a powerful form of excitement and there are people who are addicted to living dangerously and pushing the envelop; for that one more bit of excitement brought about by fear.

3) Behavior Modification – Fear of rejection, fear of being ostracized or bullied or even the fear of offending others helps in modifying people’s behaviors to make them socially acceptable. Fear of paying traffic fines or fear of drink driving accidents helps people modify their behavior for the better.

Common Fears & Phobias

Everybody has their own fears and phobias. According to a 2005 Gallup Poll, the top fears by people are

1) Snakes
2) Public Speaking
3) Heights
4) Claustrophobia
5) Spiders and Insects
6) Needles and Shots
7 ) Mice
8)  Flying

According to the Discovery Channel, the top fears are:

1) Fear of Snakes
2) Fear of Being Buried Alive
3) Fear of Heights
4) Fear of Being Bound and Tied Up
5) Fear of Drowning
6) Fear of Public Speaking
7 ) Fear of Hell
8 ) Fear of Cancer
9) Fear of Tornadoes and Hurricanes
10) Fear of Fire

In his classic book, Think and Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill listed six basic fears. He reckoned that most human beings suffer each of these fears from time to time.

1) The Fear of Poverty
2) The Fear of Criticism
3) The Fear of Ill Health
4) The Fear of Loss of Love of Someone
5) The Fear of Old Age
6) The Fear of Death

Fear of Failure

Many people are paralyzed from taking action by the fear of failure. They fear trying out things or taking action in the belief that they may fail by doing so.

Living in fear of failure means you will only attain a fraction of your success. It is best to dissect what it is you fear and take appropriate steps to correct the fear.

The Effects of Fear of Failure in Daily Life

1) Finances – Many people fear taking risks, even calculated risks in their quest for financial freedom. But in many cases, unless you are willing to venture out of your comfort zone financially, you may never reap big enough dividends to be free. Other people fear going broke or missing opportunities. People who fear missing opportunities end up chasing every opportunity that presents itself.

2) Career – Fearing that you are going to lose your job might be a genuine fear in a recession economy, but it reduces the creativity and output of a worker. People who fear taking career risks end up in mediocre roles that they hate but are too afraid to move way from.

3) Friendships – People fear being ostracized by their friends if they do not conform to the “code of conduct”. That code of conduct normally means peer pressure. People end up conforming to the whims of others to avoid rejection and humiliation. It is a great personal victory to overcome these types of fears.

4) Relationships – Many people never truly give themselves to their relationship partners because of the fear of being heart broken. They hold back and this in turn makes the partners suspect that the person is not fully committed to the relationship. Fear can prevent the deep feeling of love in relationships. The fear of commitment can also hinder relationships where one or both partners fear that their freedom will be taken away from them once they commit to the relationship. Other people end up staying in bad relationships that are emotionally draining or physically abusive because of the fear of being alone. That kind of fear can be destructive to the well being of each person in the relationship

Fear of Success

Many fear people that even after succeeding they still wont be happy. That fear can be very limit to your success. For example if you goal is to get rich and you believe that rich people are evil and will go to hell, then you might end up sabotaging yourself so you do not become rich, hence not go to hell. Clarifying your goals and making them congruent with your belief system can help with this.

Sometimes people fear that once they succeed, they will stand out from their friends and make enemies out of them. In Australia, it is called the fear of the Tall Poppy Syndrome.

People fear that success might be sweet then end. They may fear that success is not sustainable. They rationalize for example that it is better to never taste luxury and success, than taste it then lose it. People who are obese and want to lose weight might fear succeeding for a period then putting the weight back on, thus feeling like failures.

People fear that chasing success is like chasing the wind and that the more you get the more you will want. They might rationalize that it is better to stop chasing success than to become a slave of chasing more and more success eternally.

Our Greatest Fear

I like this quote by Marianne Williamson.

“It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us. Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world.

There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” —Marianne Williamson

Live Courageously

“Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Summary

Fear has its place in survival and behavior modification, but it can paralyze progress. Successful people should learn about fear and manage it, and even harness it to get the results that they want. Understand fear and put fear in its place. What kind of fears do you have? Are they limiting your success? What can you do to face or address your fears?

An emotion is a mental and physiological state associated with a wide variety of feelings, thoughts, and behavior. Answers.com defines emotions as a mental state that arises spontaneously rather than through conscious effort. Emotions are a complex subject that has been defined and examined by many researchers. We shall only be looking at a few emotions and trying to understand how they affect our success.

Emotional Intelligence

Salovey and Mayer (1990) defined emotional intelligence (EI) as “the ability to monitor one’s own and others’ feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them and to use this information to guide one’s thinking and actions.”

This series will be about improving our emotional intelligence for success in all spheres of life.

• Perceiving emotions – this means detecting and making sense of emotions. It means identifying your emotional states.
• Using emotions – harnessing emotions to change your mood, think or take action.
• Understanding emotions – comprehending how emotions relate to each other and how they evolve.
• Managing emotions – harnessing our own emotions and those of others to achieve the desired goals. It means directing emotions (positive and negative ones) towards attainment of your goals (success).

Positive and Negative Emotions

Emotions can be positive or negative. They range from joy, passion, and hope to anger, jealousy and guilt.

Some positive emotions include: Able, Accepted, Accepting, Accomplished, Accountable, Achieving, Adequate, Affluent, Ambitious, Appreciated, Assertive, Authentic, Awesome, Balanced, Beautiful, Blessed, Brave, Bright, Brilliant, Calm, Capable, Caring, Certain, Cheerful, Cherished, Comfortable, Committed, Compassionate, Complete, Composed etc

Negative emotions include:  Ashamed, Criticized, Disrespected, Embarrassed, Humiliated, Inferior, Insulted, Invalidated, Controlled, Imprisoned, Inhibited, Forced, Manipulated, Abandoned, Alone, Brushed off, Confused, Discouraged, Ignored, Insignificant, Invisible, Abused, Afraid, Attacked, Defensive,  Frightened, Insecure, Intimidated, Cynical, Guarded, Skeptical, Suspicious, Untrusting etc

Summary

As you can see, there are very many types of emotions, both positive and negative. We shall be looking of ways of harnessing our emotions for success.

If you have a suggestion of the kind of emotions to tackle in this series, I would love to hear from you either on the comments form or on the contact form on the blog.

Kind Regards.
Daniel Ngari

By law, all international students in Australia have to be insured. I was always insured as a student but once I finished studying, I stupidly let my insurance cover run out (for one month). Big mistake! I got involved in an accident during the only month that I have never had insurance in Australia. It was then that I understood that the ambulance sirens can be more expensive than the most luxurious limousines. An ice pack from an ambulance will cost you more than a full body massage in a five star hotel (if you do not have insurance). Suffice it to say that I learnt my lesson.

The purpose of this blog is to inspire you to be the best you can be. In this health series we have looked at ways of staying healthy, through the power of your mind, or through exercise and eating right. But there are times where eating right and lifting weights will not keep you away from ill health. There are moments where even apples won’t keep the doctor away. In those moments, you may need to visit a doctor or be admitted to hospital. Hospitals do not come cheap especially if you are not insured.

I remember taking a friend to one of the big hospitals in Western Australia when I was at uni. The first question that the doctors and their assistants asked was “Do you have private health insurance?” She did not have private health cover and so had to stay on the line for over six hours as the privately insured took the express lane. Have you ever seen that kind of discrimination? It happens every day in hospitals world over. Get on the express lane my friend; get insured.

What is Health Insurance?

Insurance is a means of indemnity against occurrence of an uncertain event. It is the promise of reimbursement in the case of loss; paid to people or companies so concerned about hazards that they have made prepayments to an insurance company. It is a form of risk management used to hedge against the risk of loss.

Health insurance is a form of insurance that pays for medical expenses. It may be sponsored by government or by private insurance companies. You may register for health insurance as part of a group (e.g. same employer) or buy it on your own.

Escalating Cost of Health Care

The cost of health care rises at a higher rate than inflation. Many people struggle to pay medical bills. Many others find it hard to afford the exorbitant premiums charged by insurance companies. Companies are cutting back on the health benefits awarded to employees forcing many to live without insurance.

A recent study by Harvard University researchers found that the average out-of-pocket medical debt for those who filed for bankruptcy was $12,000. Every 30 seconds in the United States someone files for bankruptcy in the aftermath of a serious health problem. (source)

For developing countries, the cost of health care continues to rise faster than the rate of growth of the economies. The gap between the rich and the poor continues to widen especially in the provision of quality health care.

The Risks of Lack of Health Insurance

• Uninsured people are more likely to forego potentially life saving tests such as mammograms.

• Uninsured people are less likely to get preventive services because of the prohibitive costs.

• They are less likely to visit doctors and dentists for routine checkups. Lack of checkups my increase the risks of unnecessary sickness.

• Uninsured patients have worse clinical outcomes than insured patients for several chronic conditions including diabetes, cardiovascular disease, end-stage renal disease, HIV infection and mental illness.

• Uninsured people are more likely to experience financial ruin after serious medical conditions.

• Lost Tax Benefits. People without Private Insurance miss out on government incentives designed to encourage people to get insured. In Australia single people earning over $50,000 per annum and couples/families earning over $100,000 per annum with no private hospital cover pay a further 1% in tax.

Summary

Health Insurance may be expensive but you should make it a priority to invest in the best health cover that you can afford. In the event that you are not covered by your employer’s group insurance, do not try to “save” by avoiding health insurance. The long term cost of being uninsured or under insured may impact heavily on your success.

If a person focuses only on what is wrong in his life, he is surely going to find something. Negative thoughts are self fulfilling prophesies. It was only when the preacher snapped out of the negative thoughts spiral that he started experiencing healing in many areas of his life and body. His teachings went straight to my heart. He was a living testament that the mind is a powerful healing agent.

In the United States, efforts to articulate the relationship between the care of the body and the state of the mind, morals and emotions date back almost 200 years. Respected psychologist and philosopher William James wrote in 1902 that “mind-cure gives to some of us serenity, moral poise, and happiness, and prevents certain forms of disease as well as science does, or even better in a certain class of persons.” A positive mental attitude, just like an apple a day, will keep the doctor away.

Dr Deepak Chopra, M.D, wrote the book Perfect Health, the first practical guide to harnessing the healing power of the mind, which became a national bestseller in the US. He teaches that though we experience our bodies as solid, they are in fact more like fires that are constantly being consumed and renewed.

We grow new stomach linings every five days, for instance. Our skin is new every five weeks. Each year, fully 98 percent of the total number of atoms in our bodies is replaced. Your thoughts are more real than your body. Freedom from sickness depends on contacting our own awareness, bringing it into balance, and then extending that balance to the body.

Positive Thinking and Health

Your mind is very powerful. You become whatever you think about or envision. Positive thinking means changing the predominant thoughts in your mind to pleasant and empowering thoughts. Some people think of it as self hypnosis, while others think of it as a way of connecting with the mystic of the universe. If you populate your mind with positive messages, you will see a fundamental shift in your fortunes, feelings and outcomes.

The father of Positive Thinking Dr Vincent Norman Peale wrote that you must “Formulate and stamp indelibly on you mind a mental picture of yourself as succeeding. And hold this picture tenaciously. You can’t ever permit it to fade. Over time your mind will develop this picture, brighten the detail. Never doubt the reality of the mental image, because doing so is dangerous. The mind also tries to complete what it pictures. So always picture “success” no matter how badly things seem to be going at the moment”.

Your mind has a tremendous impact on the recovery process. If you ever find yourself sick or disabled but have a sound mind, use your mind to will yourself back to good health or help you cope with the situation. If you want to achieve a level of fitness or quit some vice like smoking, start by visualizing yourself leading a healthier lifestyle. Good health begins with the mind and manifests in the body.

Summary

You become what you think. Positive self talk and attitude can help you achieve your healthy living goals. The thoughts that are constantly running in your mind will affect your moods and behavior. Your moods affect your choices. Your choices affect your health.

Sleep and Success

We are currently on the health series articles in this blog and I would be sleeping on my job if I did not include the topic of sleep in this series. Benjamin Franklin is often quoted as having said “Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise”.  This blog’s purpose is to inspire you to be the best you can be; to inspire you to be healthy, wealthy and wise.

I am writing this on a Sunday so let me be a good Christian and quote the Bible.

Proverbs: 6: 4-11. “Give not unnecessary sleep to your eyes, nor slumber to your eyelids. Deliver yourself, as a roe or gazelle from the hand of the fowler. Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider her ways and be wise! Which having no chief or overseer or ruler provides her food in the summer and gathers her supplies in the harvest. How long will you sleep, O sluggard? When will you rise out of your sleep? Yet a little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to lie down and sleep – So will your poverty come to you like a robber and your want like an armed man!”

Sleeping is not equal to laziness but they are first cousins. A little extra sleep here and there and you find yourself not moving fast enough to your goals. Pay special attention to your sleeping habits and gain control of your success.

What is Sleep?

Sleep is a natural and periodic state of rest during which consciousness of the world is suspended. It is characterized by reversible unconsciousness and non-responsiveness to external stimuli. Sleep is required by the body and mind to gain balance and stability. But like all good things, too much of it is has a down side.

Sleep is necessary for survival and thriving in life. Sleep deprivation occurs when one lacks the necessary amount of sleep. This may occur as a result of sleep disorders, active choice or deliberate inducement such as in interrogation or torture.

Menachem Begin, the Prime Minister of Israel from 1977-83, described his experience of sleep deprivation when a prisoner of the KGB in Russia as follows: “In the head of the interrogated prisoner, a haze begins to form. His spirit is wearied to death, his legs are unsteady, and he has one sole desire: to sleep…Anyone who has experienced this desire knows that not even hunger and thirst are comparable with it”.

Sleep is an important part of healthy living and therefore a determinant of success. Thai Ngoc, born 1942, claimed in 2006 to have been awake for 33 years or 11,700 nights, according to Vietnamese news organization Thanh Nien. It was said that Ngoc acquired the ability to go without sleep after a bout of fever in 1973. Unlike Thai Ngoc, most people need to sleep daily for about 8 hours to be mentally healthy and alert.

What is Insomnia?

Insomnia is a symptom of a sleeping disorder characterized by persistent difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep despite the opportunity. Insomnia is a symptom, not a stand-alone diagnosis or a disease. By definition, insomnia is “difficulty initiating or maintaining sleep or both” and it may be due to inadequate quality or quantity of sleep. It is typically followed by functional impairment while awake. Insomniacs have been known to complain about being unable to close their eyes or “rest their mind” for more than a few minutes at a time. (Source).

Causes of Insomnia

• Loss of a loved one. Insomnia can be common after the loss of a loved one, even years or decades after the death, if they have not gone through the grieving process. Overall, symptoms and the degree of their severity affect each individual differently depending on their mental health, physical condition, and attitude or personality.

• Anxiety – This is an unpleasant state of mental uneasiness or concern about some uncertain event; anxiety can make people lose sleep or interrupt sleeping patterns.

• Stress – Stressful situations make it harder to maintain regular sleep patterns. People experience irregular sleep patterns when stressed by relationships, career changes, financial struggles etc.

• Depression – The deep despair and hopelessness that goes along with depression may disturb sleeping patterns.

• Hormonal changes in women – These include premenstrual syndrome, menstruation, pregnancy, and menopause.

• Pain – Many sorts of emotional and physical pains can take sleep away, e.g. tooth aches.

• Adjustment sleep disorder – Adjustment sleep disorder usually describes insomnia related to acute, temporary stress (e.g., starting a new job), preoccupation (e.g., thinking about a problem), or trauma (e.g., experiencing loss). Insomnia resolves when the stress factor is resolved or when the person acclimates to the new situation.

• Jet Lag – Jet lag is a temporary condition that some people experience following air travel across several time zones in a short period of time. This causes the traveler’s internal clock to be out of sync with the external environment. People experiencing jet lag have a difficult time maintaining their internal, routine sleep-wake pattern in their new location, because external stimuli, like sunshine and local timetables, dictate a different pattern.

• Medication-Dependent Sleep Disorder – Insomnia may arise when a person who takes chronic medications, like hypnotics and antidepressants, stops taking them or develops a tolerance for them. For this reason, physicians indicate a gradual reduction in dosage of long-term medications.

Improving Sleeping Habits

• Keep a regular sleeping schedule. A regular sleeping pattern strengthens the sleep/wake cycle and promotes a regular sleep-onset time.
• Avoid coffee, cola, tea, chocolate, alcohol, and tobacco.
• What you eat. Eat healthy balanced diet. A light snack or warm milk before bedtime may promote sleep.
• Wind down for a period before sleep time. Quiet activities, such as reading, relaxing in a hot bath, prayer, or meditating, help promote sleep.
• Avoid taking naps during the day, especially in the evening. If you must nap, do so in the early afternoon for no longer than 30 minutes.
• Sleep Hygiene: Activities related to getting a good night’s sleep. Some positive sleep hygiene habits include going to bed at the same time each night
• Engage in gentle exercise to produce fatigue before sleep. Heavy exercise should be avoided just before retiring, because it delays sleep.

Sleeping Related Websites

http://www.sleepdisorderchannel.com

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sleep_deprivation

http://www.ehealthmd.com/library/insomnia/INS_causes.html

Summary

Insomnia is a leading example of sleeping disorder. A sleep disorder is a medical disorder of a person’s sleep pattern. Sleep disorders interfere with success and achievement and you should seek to control your sleeping habits in your quest for success.

Do you have any tips on sleeping patterns or a story to share on insomnia or sleeping habits? I would love to hear your comments.

What is Stress?

Stress is the consequence of the ability of the human body to respond appropriately to emotional or physical threats whether real or imagined. When something happens to us, or threatens to happen, we quickly assess it in our minds to determine if we have the skill to handle the situation. If we decide that we do not have the skill set required, we label the situation as “stressful”. If we are confident that we have the ability to deal with that situation, we don’t think of it as being “stressful”.

Stress can be caused by lack of control over one’s environment e.g. lack of food, housing, good health, freedom or mobility. Social issues such as deception, break ups, deaths, marriage and divorce can also cause stress. Other causes of stress include poverty, unemployment, depression, exams, sleep disorders, and project deadlines.

Signs of Stress

• Seeing only the negative in situations – a general disposition to look on the dark side and to expect the worst in all things.
• Anxious or racing thoughts – a feeling of mild anxiety about possible developments.
• Moodiness – having temperamental and changeable moods
• Irritability or short temper – abnormally sensitive, easily irritated or annoyed.
• Agitation, inability to relax – a mental state of extreme emotional disturbance.
• Feeling overwhelmed – feeling like you are overpowered emotionally.
• Sense of loneliness and isolation – a powerful feeling of emptiness. Isolating yourself from others.
• Depression, general unhappiness, sadness, sorrow or discontentment.
• Eating more or less – Eating disorders can be a sign of stress.
• Sleeping too much or too little – Sleep disorders can be a sign of stress.
• Procrastinating or neglecting responsibilities because of fear of outcomes.
• Using alcohol, cigarettes, or drugs to relax
• Nervousness – having an expectant void or ‘hollow feeling in the stomach’ plus the mental image of ‘will it go right’. Sometimes characterized by nail biting and pacing around.

Stress Tolerance Level

The following factors influence your tolerance for stress.

• Your support network – A strong network of supportive friends and family members is an enormous buffer against life’s stressors. On the flip side, the more lonely and isolated you are, the greater your vulnerability to stress.
• Your sense of control – If you have confidence in yourself and your ability to influence events and persevere through challenges, it’s easier to take stress in stride.
• Your attitude and outlook – Stress-hardy people have an optimistic attitude. They tend to embrace challenges, have a strong sense of humor, accept that change is a part of life, and believe in a higher power or purpose.
• Your ability to deal with your emotions. You’re extremely vulnerable to stress if you don’t know how to calm and soothe yourself when you’re feeling sad, angry, or afraid.
• Your knowledge and preparation – The more you know about a stressful situation, including how long it will last and what to expect, the easier it is to cope. For example, if you go into surgery with a realistic picture of what to expect post-op, a painful recovery will be less traumatic than if you were expecting to bounce back immediately. (Source)

Stress & Success

Stress results from the imbalance between demands and resources. It occurs when a person doubts his or her ability to cope. Stress is not a direct response to a stressor but rather one’s resources and ability to cope. Developing the ability to cope with situations leads to both success and reduced stress.

• Health and Wellness - What we eat affects how we feel and think. Eating foods high in saturated fats, cholesterol and sugar leads to digestion problems, inability to concentrate and other stress symptoms that hinder our ability to succeed. Avoid excessive amounts of caffeine and alcohol. Eat healthy foods such as fruits, vegetables, protein and grain, and drink at least six glasses of water to stay in top physical form. Regular exercise reduces stress as well.

• Work & Career- Workplace stress is the harmful physical and emotional responses that can happen when there is a conflict between job demands on the employee and the amount of control an employee has over meeting these demands. You can reduce work place stress by finding a satisfying job that is in line with your passion and abilities. Preparation and managing expectations can also help reduce career stress.

• Financial Freedom- Lack of or fear of earning potential in an uncertain economy can lead to stress. Fear of losing a job or not being able to service your loan can also lead to stress. Gain knowledge on how to gain financial freedom by reading and consulting with experts. Remember to plan ahead and let the power of compounding work in your favor.

• Home & Family- Family situations such as deaths, births, reunions, conflict, marriage and divorce can lead to stress. It is best to have a loving attitude and a big heart to accommodate the views of others in the family. Working towards a good family and home life can reduce stress and serve as a buffer to stress caused by other areas of life.

• Mental & Emotions- Success or failure is all in the mind. You should develop a positive attitude to help you cope with stress. Believing in yourself and your abilities can help you deal with the toughest of situations. Negative self talk leads to self sabotage and causes stress. You should seek to speak positive and empowering words to yourself and to others.

Summary

Stress occurs when a person doubts his or her ability to cope. A positive mental attitude and positive self talk can help in coping with stress.

Stress affects our level of success especially when it leads to procrastination and inaction. We should seek to develop a high tolerance to stressful situations. Preparation and gaining knowledge can help in dealing with stress. The more you know about a stressful situation, including how long it will last and what to expect, the easier it is to cope.

Eating right and regular exercise also helps in reducing stress. The ability to bring your emotions into balance helps you bounce back from adversity. Always believe in yourself.

His resignation and reasons given were hailed as “extraordinary public service”. His resignation marked a step forward in the destigmatisation of mental illness in Australia.

Gordon Parker, of Sydney’s Black Dog Institute, predicted Dr Gallop’s confession would assist other people, particularly men, in seeking help for their own mental health problems. “It’s a marker of how destigmatisation is proceeding in this country for a politician to be able to … openly use the word depression as a reason for stepping down”.

Professor Parker said Dr Gallop’s diagnosis was a reminder that “the black dog” did not respect rank or position. It can affect anybody at any time,” he said. Around one million Australian adults and 100,000 young people live with depression each year.

Dr Gallop is now a Professor and Director, Graduate School of Government at the University of Sydney, Australia. He gave a speech titled “Depression – past, present and future” at the launch of Beaton Consulting/beyondblue Annual Professions Survey, in Melbourne on the 23rd of April 2007. Below are some highlights from his speech.

• Since my own decision to seek medical help for depression early in 2006 I have learnt a good deal about myself and the condition which we have appropriately labelled “The Black Dog”

• However, in order to learn these things I had to acknowledge that I had a problem. Self help only follows when there is self awareness. By its very nature depression is a secret for whom there is no story-teller. Not talking about it is part of its definition.

• We hold it in as it tears away at our senses and our sensibility. It’s very personal and its very deep. We disconnect from the world and from others, with despair occasionally descending into a living hell.

What is Depression?

Depression is a mental disorder characterized by a pervasive low mood, low self-esteem, and loss of interest or pleasure in normally enjoyable activities. Depression is one of the most common of all mental health problems. One in five people experience depression at some stage of their lives.

Depression is more than just a low mood – it’s a serious illness. While we all feel sad, moody or low from time to time, some people experience these feelings intensely, for long periods of time and often without reason. People with depression find it hard to function every day and may be reluctant to participate in activities they once enjoyed. (beyondblue.org.au)

Types of Depression

• Major depression – a depressed mood that lasts for at least two weeks. This may also be referred to as clinical depression or unipolar depression.
• Psychotic depression – a state of depression so severe that the person loses contact with reality and suffers a variety of functional impairments. It is a depressed mood which includes symptoms of psychosis. Psychosis involves seeing or hearing things that are not there (hallucinations), feeling everyone is against you (paranoia) and having delusions.
• Dysthymia – is a type of low-grade depression typified by depressed mood that lasts for years.
• Mixed depression and anxiety – a combination of symptoms of depression and anxiety.
• Bipolar disorder – (formally known as manic depressive illness) – involves periods of feeling low (depressed) and high (manic). (Source)

Symptoms of Depression

• Self Esteem – Low self-esteem is a symptom of depression.
• Sleeping Patterns – Depression can lead to irregular sleep patterns and insomnia.
• Appetite – Depression tends to suppress most biological functions and drives related to hunger. Changes in appetite or weight may signal depression.
• Negative Emotions – Depression brings forth negative emotions such as pessimism, anger, guilt, irritability and anxiety.
• Emotional Rollercoaster – Varying emotions throughout the day, for example, feeling worse in the morning and better as the day progresses
• Hard to Please: Hobbies and interests may no longer be pleasing. Depression leads to lack of interest in activities or moments previously enjoyed.
• House of Pain: Depression may make one more susceptible to a host of pains and ailments.
• Changed sex drive: absent or reduced
• Concentration and Memory: some people are so impaired that they think that they are becoming demented.
• Reduced motivation: it doesn’t seem worth the effort to do anything, things seem meaningless.

There is a simple depression quiz on http://www.webmd.com/depression/depression-symptom-quiz that can be used to diagnose depression.

Antidepressants

An antidepressant is a psychiatric medication used for alleviating major depression. It is a class of drugs used to treat depression; and often have undesirable side effects.

Depression and suicide

Although most people who are depressed do not kill themselves, untreated depression can increase the risk of possible suicide. It is not uncommon for depressed individuals to have thoughts about suicide whether or not they intend to act on these thoughts. Up to 15% of those who are clinically depressed die by suicide. The deep despair and hopelessness that goes along with depression can make suicide feel like the only way to make the pain go away. If someone you know is threatening suicide or talking of wanting to hurt him/herself, seek professional help right away.

Useful Depression Links

• http://www.webmd.com/depression/default.htm
• http://www.beyondblue.org.au
• http://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au
• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clinical_depression
• http://www.helpguide.org/mental/depression_signs_types_diagnosis_treatment.htm

Summary

Depression is a serious mental problem that affects 1 in 5. It can lead to suicide on one extreme but for the vast majority of people, it is only mild, but enough to curtail happiness and achievement.

If you suspect you have depression, there is no shame in seeking medical assistance as illustrated by former WA premier Dr Geoff Gallop.

Do you have thoughts on depression that you would like to share with fellow readers? Have you ever been depressed? Do you know anyone who has gone through depression? Do you have a unique point or insight that you can add to this topic? I would love to hear your opinion. Thank you.

Drinking Cultures

Drinking culture refers to the customs and practices of people who drink alcoholic beverages. I happen to have lived in two countries with strong drinking cultures (Australia and Kenya). I have seen first hand the joys of alcohol and the impact of alcohol on individuals, families and societies.

According to ConvictCreations.com, “Australia used to be one of the world’s great drinking nations. It is believed that during the Convict era, when rum was used as currency, the colony’s inhabitants drank more alcohol per capita that any other time in human history. The high rate of consumption is understandable considering that the first fleet brought enough food for two years and enough grog for four”.

Kenyans love their alcohol, just like Aussies do. One of the most successful companies in Kenya is East African Breweries. The company claims to be responsible for “bringing people together” with its range of beverage brands that appeal to a huge portion of the population.

There are many reasons for drinking or abstaining from alcohol, many of which are influenced by culture. But regardless of the drinking culture in your country, neighborhood or city, you should make conscious decisions on what level of drinking is good for you.

The Benefits of Alcohol

• Moderate consumption of alcohol helps people in socializing and relaxation. Social drinking plays an important role in such social functions as dating. For example, a person buying another a drink at a singles bar is a gesture that one is interested in the other and often initiates conversation, or at least flirtation.
• Alcohol helps people see the world in a new perspective. “Beauty lies in the eyes of the beer holder”.
• Moderate consumption of alcohol helps prevent some diseases such as coronary heart disease and ischemic stroke in older people. There is very little health benefit for alcohol consumption by people aged less than 45 years.

NB: I have spent more than two hours flying around the internet looking for the benefits of alcohol. I did not find much. Most of the claims of alcohol being beneficial to health have been rebutted by more scientific evidence. It looks like the science community long decided that alcohol is not good for us. <sobs>

Binge drinking

Binge drinking is sometimes defined as drinking alcohol solely for the purpose of intoxication, although it is quite common for binge drinking to apply to a social situation, creating some overlap in social and binge drinking. Some researchers define binge drinking as a woman consuming four drinks and a man consuming five drinks on an occasion. Could you be a Binge Drinker?

The Effects of Binge Drinking and Alcohol

While I could not find too many positives to do with alcohol, I found the following negatives. Please drink responsibly or better yet – quit!

• Calories – With 7 calories per gram, the number of calories in alcohol is second only after fat (9 cals/g). If you are trying to control your weight, avoid alcohol. Alcohol will thwart your weight loss efforts more than most foods.
• Hangovers – A hangover describes the sum of unpleasant physiological effects following heavy consumption of drugs, particularly alcoholic beverages. The most commonly reported characteristics of a hangover include headache, nausea, sensitivity to light and noise, lethargy, and thirst.
• Accidents – Alcohol related accidents include traffic accidents, domestic or work related accidents. They may result in serious injury or death.
• Break ups – Alcohol may fuel irrational behavior such as jealousy and violence that may break up relationships and families.
• Flow on effects to other parts of your life – Drinking excessive amounts of alcohol spreads its negative energy to other areas of life. For example, heavy drinkers are less likely to be productive at work.
• Hinders creativity – Alcohol slows down the brain functions and impairs creativity. If you want to succeed in life you need a fresh beautiful mind that is free from alcohol.
• Escapism – you should face your fears and demons and address underlying issues instead of finding solace in the bottle.
• Types of Friends – If you surround yourself with drinking buddies everyday or even just during the weekends, you may be missing out on a whole lot of people out there. There are many good people who do not hit the clubs or pubs. They may be the friends that may make you happy or help make a difference in your life. Avoid the myth that deals are made in pubs. The big deals are made when sober.
• Wastes time – Alcohol is the thief of time. Time spent recovering from hangovers or sitting at a pub could be used for other pursuits in life. Remember there is an opportunity cost for every hour of drinking.
• Alcoholism - Continuous heavy drinking over a long period of time can lead to a person becoming physically and psychologically dependent on alcohol.
• Expensive - Alcohol is expensive, not just in the money that you spend buying beer, wine or spirits, but in the opportunity cost and consequences of drinking. Decide if the price is right for you.
• Health Problems – Significant damage to the brain and liver.
• Depression and suicide – Alcohol can fuel depression and suicidal tendencies.
• Amnesia – Amnesia means the loss of memory; forgetfulness. Alcohol leads to temporary and even permanent amnesia.

Breaking Free from Binge Drinking

• Set limits for yourself and stick to them
• Try having a ‘spacer’ – alternating non-alcoholic drinks with alcoholic drinks
• Drink slowly. Take sips not gulps
• Try low alcohol alternatives
• Eat before or while you are drinking, avoid salty snacks, they make you thirsty
• Have one drink at a time, so you can keep track
• Avoid sculling competitions, and drinking games
• Stay busy – don’t just sit and drink
• Be assertive – don’t be pressured into drinking more than you want or intend to.

Seven Humorous Side effects of Alcohol…. And remedies!!! (Courtesy of Sam @ Kasarani.com)

1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet.

Cause: Glass is being held at incorrect angle (You are pouring the Drink on your feet).

Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward

2. Symptom: The wall facing you is full of lights.

Cause: You’re lying on the floor.

Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.

3. Symptom: The floor looks blurry.

Cause: You’re looking through an empty glass.

Cure: Quickly refill with your favorite drink!

4. Symptom: The floor is moving.

Cause: You’re being dragged away.

Cure: At least ask where they’re taking you!

5. Symptom: You hear echoes every time someone speaks.

Cause: You have your glass on your ear.

Cure: Stop making a fool of yourself!

6. Symptom: Your dad and all your brothers are looking funny.

Cause: You’re in the wrong house.

Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house.

7. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and the music is very repetitive.

Cause: You’re in an ambulance.

Cure: Don’t move. Let the professionals do their job.

Are you an Alcoholic?

Alcoholism refers to any condition that result in the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages despite health problems and negative social consequences.

The Journal of the American Medical Association defines alcoholism as “a primary, chronic disease characterized by impaired control over drinking, preoccupation with the drug alcohol, use of alcohol despite adverse consequences, and distortions in thinking.”

The CAGE questionnaire, named for its four questions may be used to screen patients quickly in a doctor’s office. Two “yes” responses indicate that the respondent should be investigated further. The questionnaire asks the following questions:

1. Have you ever felt you needed to Cut down on your drinking?

2. Have people Annoyed you by criticizing your drinking?

3. Have you ever felt Guilty about drinking?

4. Have you ever felt you needed a drink first thing in the morning (Eye-opener) to steady your nerves or to get rid of a hangover?

The following test has been adapted from the NCADD Self -Test” (National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence – USA)

1.  Do you ever drink heavily when you are disappointed, under pressure or have had a quarrel with someone?

2. Can you handle more alcohol now than when you first started to drink?

3. Have you ever been unable to remember part of the previous evening, even though your friends said that you did not pass out?

4. When drinking with other people, do you try to have a few extra drinks when others won’t know about?

5. Do you sometimes feel uncomfortable if alcohol is not available?

6. Do you sometimes feel a little guilty about your drinking?

7. Are you in more of a hurry to get your first drink of the day than you used to be?

8. Has a family member or close friend ever expressed concern or complained about your drinking?

9. Have you been having more memory ‘blackouts’ recently?

10. Do you often want to continue drinking after your friends say they’ve had enough?

11. Do you usually have a reason for the occasions when you drink heavily?

12. When you’re sober, do you sometimes regret things you did or said while drinking?

13. Have you tried switching brands or drinks, or following different plans to control your drinking?

14. Have you sometimes failed to keep promises you made to yourself about controlling or cutting down on your drinking?

15. Have you ever had a DWI (driving while intoxicated) or DUI (driving under the influence of alcohol) violation, or any other legal problem related to your drinking?

16. Do you try to avoid family or close friends while you are drinking?

17. Are you having more financial, work, school and/or family problems as a result of your drinking?

18. Has your physician ever advised you to cut down on your drinking?

19. Do you eat very little or irregularly during the periods when you are drinking?

20. Do you ever feel depressed or anxious before, during or after of heavy drinking?

Any “yes” answer indicates that you may be at a greater risk for alcoholism.  More than one “yes” answer may indicate the presence of an alcohol-related problem or alcoholism, and the need for consultation with a alcoholism professional.

Summary

The true cost of alcohol is very high. The cons outweigh the pros. Decide if you are willing to pay such a high price in your life before you have the next drink. Moderation is the key, but quitting is gold.

If you have any comments on the true cost of alcohol or a different opinion on any issue, please feel free to post in the comments section. Your comments are most welcome.

Net Calories Intake

Yesterday we talked about the health benefits of eating right. I mentioned that the amount of food that you eat per day (intake) minus the amount of energy that you burn through daily activities and exercise (output) equals your net calories.

To maintain your ideal weight, you should seek to burn out any excess calories consumed in a given day. You need to reduce your net calorie intake (through exercise) when seeking to lose weight.

Why Exercise Daily?

The Power of Compounding: Burning an extra 200 calories per day is easier than trying to lose 1400 calories one day a week. There is a cumulative benefit to exercise, for example in muscle development. The more you exercise the stronger you become and the better you get at handling tougher exercise routines. Just like a saving plan, it is more effective to start early.

Types of Exercise

According to Wikipedia, Exercises are generally grouped into three types depending on the overall effect they have on the human body:

• Flexibility exercises, such as stretching, improve the range of motion of muscles and joints.
• Aerobic exercises, such as cycling, swimming, walking, rowing, running, hiking or playing tennis, focus on increasing cardiovascular endurance.
• Anaerobic exercises, such as weight training, functional training or sprinting, increase short-term muscle strength.

Benefits of Exercise

1. Exercise in combination with a balanced diet, helps maintain healthy weight
2. Sticking to an exercise program helps develop mental discipline to take on many challenges in life.
3. It helps develop valuable character traits such as persistence, follow up and commitment.
4. Exercise helps in building confidence and body image.
5. Exercise helps in relaxation, stress relief and emotional stability.
6. Exercise helps keep away fat and diseases. The time and money spent in exercise pales in comparison to time and money that would be spent fighting diseases.
7. Exercise helps improve strength and tenacity to take on challenges.
8. Improves psychological well-being

Barriers to Exercise

Everybody finds a reason not to exercise from time to time. The following are some of the most common reasons cited for not being disciplined enough to exercise.

• Lack of time due to work or family commitments.
• Lack of equipment or gym membership.
• Lack of facilities nearby.
• Personal safety when exercising outdoors alone.
• Poor weather or night-time lighting.

A Poor Man’s Exercise Guide

In tough economic times, many people quote lack of gym membership fees as the main reason for not exercising. The following are types of exercises that you can do at no cost.

• Walking out doors. Walk to the shops, alight from the bus or park your car a kilometer or more from your destination and walk.
• Sit ups and Push ups in the house. Before you even get out of bed in the morning, do 10 stomach crunches while lying flat on your mattress. Increase daily by one until you get up to 100.
• Weight Lifting – Find something heavy to lift! J
• Running or Cycling
• Get an exercise friend to do joint exercise.
• Sports – Join a football team or any sports team.

Find Thirty Campaign

The Find thirty ^® campaign is an Australia States Government initiative that encourages people to be sufficiently active for good health. The campaign states that 30 minutes of moderate-intensity physical activity on most days of the week is all you need.

Some of the recommendations of this campaign are:

1. Set goals

Set goals for your activity that are specific and realistic.  You may find it beneficial to set short, medium and long-term goals. Revisit regularly and if necessary amend your goals to ensure they are still achievable.

Reward yourself when you reach your goals. This can give you a great sense of achievement and confidence.

2. Be active with others

Be active with friends or family. Make a regular time to meet to go walking or take part in other activities.  This way you can motivate and encourage one another and have fun at the same time.

3. Make physical activity a part of your day

Include physical activity in your daily routine. Set your alarm for thirty minutes earlier each morning or use your lunch break to go for a walk.

You can also:

• Walk somewhere to eat your lunch
• Take the stairs instead of the lift
• Walk or cycle with your children to school or for other short trips
• Leave the car at home and take public transport
• Park your car a 10-15 minute walk away from your destination.

4. Choose an activity that you enjoy

There are lots of fun activities for you to enjoy. How about salsa dancing, aqua aerobics, Pilates, bush walking or gardening?

http://www.findthirtyeveryday.com.au

Summary

Exercise is very important for your health. You should seek to benefit from daily exercise. Avoid excuses including those of lack or time or money. There are viable alternatives for the willing. You should seek to find at least 30 minutes of exercise everyday.

I would love to hear from readers. Do you exercise everyday? Are you a member of a health club? What handy tips can you give us about exercise?

Nutrition Basics

There are seven major classes of nutrients: carbohydrates, fats, fiber, minerals, protein, vitamins, and water. Just like your biology teacher said, you need to eat a healthy balanced diet with all classes of nutrients to support life.

Poor diet can have an injurious impact on health, causing deficiency diseases such as scurvy, beriberi, and kwashiorkor; health-threatening conditions like obesity and metabolic syndrome, and diseases such as cardiovascular disease, diabetes, and osteoporosis. (Wikipedia)

Nutritional science investigates the metabolic and physiological responses of the body to diet. Great strides have been made in the last century about the impact of food on our bodies. At a minimum, you should familiarize yourself with the basics of nutrition to ensure that you are feeding your body with the right kind of foods.

Body Mass Index (BMI)

BMI is a measure of weight proportionate to height. BMI is calculated by dividing a person’s weight (in kilograms) by his or her height (in meters, squared).

BMI is the most widely used diagnostic tool to identify weight problem within a population including: underweight, overweight and obesity. You can learn more about BMI from this Wikipedia Page.

Calculating your BMI is a useful first point of nutrition, dieting and exercise programs. It helps you determine if you need to lose weight, or gain weight. There are many free online BMI calculators. For example this page.

Calorie Counting

A calorie is the unit of measure for the amount of energy released when the body breaks down food. It is the measure of energy value of food. Not all foods are created equal. Some foods have higher calorie density than others. For example, chocolates have a very high calorie density. Fruits and vegetables have lower calorie density.

There are many online calculators for the recommended daily calorie intake. Eating more than your recommended daily calorie intake will make you add weight.

The amount of food that you eat per day (intake) minus the amount of energy that you burn through daily activities and exercise (output) equals your net calories.

Metabolism Rate

Metabolism is the sum of all the chemical and physical changes that take place in your body to keep it growing and functioning. People have different metabolism rates, and that is why some people eat a whole lot without gaining weight proportionately.

If you need to lose weight, boosting your metabolism rate is a great way of burning stored fat. You can boost your metabolism rate by building muscles, exercising and the choice of foods you take. Foods that are high in dietary fiber are great for boosting metabolism rate.

Emotional Eating

Emotional eating means eating in response to emotions instead of hunger pangs. When people are happy they rush for their favorite dish. When lonely they run for another dish.  Emotional eating, unlike hunger eating comes very suddenly. You get to feel like you need that kind of food right now. Emotional eating may leave feelings of guilt especially for people trying to control their weight.

Food Cravings & Habits

Pregnant women experience food cravings as a result of their body working 24/7 to feed two or three people (in case of twins). The cravings may signal the lack of certain nutrients in the body and as such, they should eat what their body craves.

Some food cravings are not driven by any dietary requirements. They are driven by taste, texture, color, aroma and temperature.  In Kenya (where I and President Obama’s father came from), many people experience the craving for “Nyama Choma” (roast meat), after the first beer. Passing by a “Nyama Choma” joint produces an instant craving based on the aroma. We need to be careful about eating just because of cravings as opposed to nourishment.

Binge Eating

I know someone who was expelled from an “All You Can Eat“ restaurant. Yes. Expelled!

Some people eat too much food. Too much of anything is poisonous. Binge eating is when a person rapidly consumes an excessive amount of food. It also means eating an unusually large amount of food at one time — more than a normal person would eat in the same amount of time. Avoid binge eating at all costs.

See Food Diet

Some people cannot resist the sight or aroma of food. They see it, they want it. They smell it they want it.

Having a controlled eating habit is a good way of avoiding “see food diets”. Determine in advance what you are going to eat during the day instead of reacting to what the world or fridge presents. Many “see food dieters” are easily influenced by advertisements and commercials about food.

Fast Food Diet

Fast food joints are a first stop for many “See food dieters”. Fast food joints (Junk Food Joints) have perfected the art of food advertising and appealing to impulses of millions.

I remember one of our teachers in high school telling us that “junk food = junk brain”. Of course at the time, his views did not resonate with us students. Having junk food, in our opinion, beat the crappy school food on all counts. There was nothing as enjoyable as eating “Luthuli Chips” when everyone else was rushing to the school dinning hall. Do you find yourself loving junk food instead of healthier food choices? I know the feeling.

Healthy Recipes

Instead of eating fast foods you should create a few healthy recipes. There are many recipe ideas on the net but in general make sure that your recipe reflects your body’s nutritional requirements.

If you are planning to lose weight, have a healthy recipe that is low in fat, high in fibre and low in calorie density.

Summary

I have only scratched the surface on this wide and fascinating topic of food and nutrition. It is something that we do a few times a day. It is surprising that many people do not pay attention to what they eat and the implications to their long term health. Paying attention on what you consume will have a big impact on your level of success in your physical health and wellness.

I would love to hear your thoughts and ideas on how food impacts our lives, or if you have any handy tips for maintaining proper diet, losing weight, gaining muscle and fighting disease through healthy eating.

I remember reading a book by Nelson Mandela called the Long Walk to Freedom. There was a quote that I really like. I do not feel worthy to use the great words of Mandela, but I cannot find better words to describe how I feel right now on this blog’s journey and today’s milestone.

I have walked the long road to freedom. I have tried not to falter; I have made missteps along the way. But I have discovered the secret that after climbing a great hill, one only finds that there are many more hills to climb. I have taken a moment here to rest, to look back on the distance I have come. But I can rest only for a moment, for with freedom come responsibilities, and I dare not linger, for my long walk is not yet ended.

The long walk to inspiring my friends on this blog has not ended. In fact it has just begun. There are so many topics and areas of life that I want to touch on. After posting 50 blogs, I have been exposed to a lot of people and ideas. After climbing a great hill, I have found many more to climb. But today I take a moment to reflect on the distance we have come, but we can only rest for a moment. The journey for success has just begun.

When I launched the blog, I stated the following as my reasons for blogging. They remain true today.

Why am I doing this?

• I am running this website as a way of giving back to the internet community that has so generously given me a living for the last 7 years.
• It is a great way to connect with people and to learn from my friends.
• To promote my other website Kasarani.com – A site dedicated to bringing Kenyans together.
• To document my successes and challenges in the hope of inspiring others.
• To make new friends, contacts and possible future business partners.

At this point in time, there are about 500 people reading this blog per day from more than 40 countries. Many have posted comments and others sent me encouraging messages, telling me that they have been inspired by the blog. That is my fuel for continuing to blog. This blog has been a great way to connect with people and learn from my friends.

The blog has also been quite useful for leading the Kenyan readers to Kasarani.com. I have “met” so many people through this blog, many of whom will remain my friends for years to come and be possible business partners. I have got the joy that I prayed for when I launched this blog. I hope you have been inspired by the blog so far.

Ideas without Action are Worthless

I suspected that blogging was powerful but had never realized how powerful it really is. For a few months, I was thinking of launching the blog, but never got around to it. It took one piece of advice from Mwangi, a fellow blogger to get me moving. He told me to focus on taking action instead of trying to fit all the pieces in the puzzle.

Many of us aspire to be a success in this or that. But we never really let our dreams move from our mind to their physical equivalent. Taking action is what has brought this blog to life. I encourage you to turn your ideas into action. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

What the Future Holds

I will continue writing blog posts for the next few months or years on a variety of topics. The topics will include health, careers, travel, relationships, finance, technology, business, education, sports, entertainment, character, emotions, sex, family, travel etc. These will be arranged in series, with each series having between 5 and 20 blog posts.

The site will be expanded to allow more interactivity and sense of community between members. This will allow us to leverage each others strengths and life experiences in order to grow and succeed in all aspects of life.

The Power of Gratitude

Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. Marcel Proust

I would like to take this opportunity to thank all the people who have supported this blog in every way. I really appreciate your support. We have been in this journey together. Thank you.

In particular, the people who have posted comments on this blog have helped bring a different point of view, and encouraged me to continue writing. First I would like to thank the top 20 commenters, ranked by the number of comments posted: Paula, Nyomi, Brenda Njeru, Joy, Charity, Alen, Carol, James Karuku, Tommy Adebayo, M. Mwangi, David Hamilton, John, Rachel, Irene, Sam, Ken Mwangi, James Gitau, Philip W, Sublimity, Mwangi – the Displaced African.

I would also like to recognize the following people for posting comments. The list is long so I have arranged them alphabetically; Antony Ngari, Abdullatif Manjothi, Aileen Veleci, Aisha, Akams, Allan Lucumay Amelia Mwendwa, Amo, Andrew Muasya , Andrew Njuguna, Andrson , Angeey, Ann Kibunja, Anne, Anne , Anthony, Atef , Atieno South Korea, Austine Viera, Babu, Ben Gathogo, Benn Rono, Bikundo, Boyfulani, Carol Achieng Otieno, Carolyn, Cate, Catherine, Cathy Nyawira, Cecilia Kabura, Cee, Charles, Charles Oloo, Charles Simba, Christine Magati, Colin, Dan Mahiri, Daniel ,Daniel “Jeshi-X” Ngari – Kenya , David Kamau, David M, Dennis Muchiri, Diana, Dickson Mwangangi, Doba, Edu, Elly, Emile, Emily A, Eric Muema Kiilu, Erica Kiptoo, Esther Kinene, Eston, Eva Kamiri, Evah, Faiza, Felix, Fred Michori, Gabriel Kemboi, Gabriel Olofu, Gathoni Kimuyu, George, George Mutale, Georgia Atieno, Gitau, Gladys Maina, Gorata, Grace, Grace, Hildah, Humphrey Mburu, Ibe Arua, Irene Kiptoo, Irungu, Irungu Wagura, Jackie, James Adolwa, James Muriuki, James Mwendwa Kivuva, Janet, Jazz, Jeri, Job Kungu, John, John Onyango Rare, John Tedesco, Joram, Joseph Karuga, Josephine Macharia, Josphine Njeri, Joyce, Joyce, Juliet, June, Kami Wa Nyina Wa Macua, Kanja Paul, Kaoumiuz, Karanja Kamotho, Karen, Kennedy Kamau, Kim Anointted, Kimaku, Kip, Kuria Steve, Leybowuwoya, Linda, Linda K. Mugo, Linet Kerubo, Liz, Liz, Lloyd Kikunzu, Lorna, Louise Nyaboke, Lucie, Lucy Mundia, Lucynd, Lydia, Lydia Muriithi, Macharia, Manciny Neemoh Migwi, Marcel Masaga, Martin Muchira, Marto, Max, Mayoress, Meli, Michael Murithi, Michelle M, Mike, Mike Kamanu, Milly, Miriam Ruff, Molly, Morris, Moses Waruiru, Motivational, Mumbi, Muthoka, Mutuma Timothy, Mwalimu, Mwangangi, Nancy, Narasha, Natty Dread, Nellie, Nelson, Nganga, Nick Tumbo, Nimo, Nisa, Njeri, Njeri, Nya, Nyayiemi, Onesmus Makori, Pam, Patrick Odhiambo, Paul Gitonga, Paula, Pauline Mwaniki, Peter Mburu, Peter Nduati, Phoebe, Prince Miyake, Racheal Wangari Njeru, Rachel, Rajab, Renee M, Rue , Roy, Sally, Shad rack, Shad rack, Showy, Simon, Slimjess, Sophie, Stan, Steve, Steve Nick, Steve Njau (Kybs), Sulaiman, Susannah, Thaka, Tom Kabau, Victor, Vikky, Wanja, Wilson Odhiambo, Woji Christian C, Xtine Dida, Zippy,

I would also like to appreciate all the people who have sent me messages on Facebook, friendship requests, and shared the blog posts with their friends on social networks and via email. Thank you so much.

Here are the 50 blog posts so far.

Introduction Series

1 – Welcome to DanielNgari.com

2 – What does Success mean to you?

3 – Do you have a Blueprint for Success?

4 – What do you focus on?

5 – Success: How badly do you want it?

6 – You reap what you sow.

7 – What is Kaizen?

8 – Run your life like a Corporation.

9 – Financial Freedom Manifesto

10 – The Amazing Power of Compounding

11 – Travel Light to Success

12 – The Law of Giving

13 – Write your Living Obituary

14 – Rising above Mediocrity

15 – Shun Intolerance

16 – Rekindle your Dormant Passion!

17 – Are you a Prisoner or a Hostage?

18 – Wheel of Fortune No More!

Power Series

19 – The Power of Persistence

20 – The Power of Gratitude

21 – The Power of Positive Thinking

22 – The Power of Hard Work

23 – The Power of Perspectives

24 – The Power of Commitment

25 – The Power of Visualization

26 – The Power of Action

27 – The Power of Discipline

28 – The Power of Follow Up

29 – The Power of Self Mastery

30 – Power Series Summary – A Personal Story

People Series

31 – Succeed by Building Others Up

32 – We are One but we are Many – Race & Racism

33 – How to Bring Out the Best in People

34 – Are You Addicted to Hot Juicy Gossip?

35 – Show Me Your Friends

36 – The Curse of Conformity

37 – A Magic Word Called Empathy

38 – Meet Invisible People

39 – Stuff Positive People Like

40 – A Winning Contacts Building Strategy

41 – People Series Summary – People & Success

Mind Series

42 – A Beautiful Mind – (Not the Movie)

43 – Concentration Precedes Success

44 – The Joy of a Winning Mindset

45 – The Value of Specialized Knowledge

46 – The Amazing Power of “Why”

47 – Live Courageously – Put Fear in its Place

48 – The Quickest Path to Happiness

49 – Speed Reading For Prosperity

50 – Mind Series Summary – It is all in the Mind

Summary

I am glad that you have joined me on this journey of self discovery and success lessons on this blog. We have reached a small milestone and I am happy to celebrate. But we can only linger for a moment. There are more blog posts to write, more things to learn. There are more people to reach out to.

I would love to hear your comments on how the blog has impacted you and what kind of articles you would love to be reading on the blog. In the next few days, I will be upgrading the website to allow for more interactivity. The focus now is not just me inspiring my friends, it is now about friends inspiring each other.